Shaken and Stirred – 15th December 2022

The drudgery of the day-to-day
Took our childlike sense away
No longer dwarfed by all around
Bored with all the knowledge found

No longer novel and mysterious
Everything became so serious
Less scared of what’s seen and heard
Memories need to be shaken and stirred

The eyes of children opened wide
Light pouring in deep down inside
Inspiration to seek the sublime
A world in which you can redefine


The battle against conformity requires you to adhere to another kind of conformity.

Dana Kletter, from Manchild 5

Today I’m feeling:
Happy and positive though a little tired due to the lack of sleep from recent nights.
Today I’m grateful for:
The school director thanking us teachers for our hard work and effort at his school. Even if it was just a vague excuse for a meeting arranged by TLC as pats on each other’s backs, I still appreciate that he said these things. Most of the time we feel quite unrecognised and underappreciated. Of course, no pay rise, no bonus, and no Christmas gifts for us! Oh well, my coffee schedule messed up by the meeting I took the opportunity to invite David to House for a quick Kickstarter brew.
The best thing about today was:
My unruly class of kids in 1/7. Before it started I took Goy aside and asked how she felt about my class. She’s a quiet and top-grade productive student and I don’t get chance to talk with her much. She said she liked the class but when prompted said that it was too easy. I know this and apologised to her but she understood that I have many low-skilled students to manage. I asked her about her classmates and she said they were very annoying and make it difficult to concentrate. Obviously, I agreed and I thanked her for her thoughts. I was glad that she was happy with me as a teacher at least. Back in class, the kids wandered in lazily and mostly in high spirits. The two that I kicked out on Tuesday sheepishly laid low in their seats but I made an effort to try and engage Nong Aoi though she insisted she couldn’t write because her hand was hurting. I tried to make it fun by writing with my other hand which she tried for about ten seconds before giving up. With my left hand I write ‘Aoi ❤️ ?’ and Saipan and Rista got excited and said ‘Geno’. So I got a little embarrassed but it gave me an idea. I quickly got to a break point with some writing and hooked up the speaker and searched YouTube for Dexys ‘Geno’ and started playing it. Many kids got up to dance including Aoi and she had a big smile on her face. It was good to see. I settled them all back down with a promise to play it again at the end of the class. After a while, Aoi asked to escort another student who was feeling sick to the bathroom, however, a few minutes later she turned up with four boys, one of which was Geno. They stuck around for a while but got bored waiting until the end of class. When it did come I played Geno again and other excited dancing kids asked for a couple of other songs and that’s how it ended. I love these kids, one moment crazy upset, the next crazy happy. Just like every other human you ever met.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Last night I found a scratch on Kim Chi that looked pretty serious. Amy was concerned and we talked about whether and when to take her to the vet. It was already 9.30 and I was ready to sleep. We decided not to go then but spent the next couple of hours trying to clean the wound and watching her, putting on a collar to stop her licking and discussing what to do today. As we give her a special medicine for her leukaemia, we don’t generally give her any other medicine from the vet so as not to mix them. She seemed ok this morning and ate without a problem, just annoyed at having her collar on. I called Amy later from school and she’d cleaned up Kim’s room again and decided to keep her there to keep her out of any more trouble. When I got home though she seemed to be more uncomfortable with the wound, which is right on her empty ballbag and was weeping a little cloudy fluid. We quickly decided we should take her to the vet which meant a 2-hour round trip and not a relaxing evening at home. But this is what we do for those we love and so I enjoyed the drive, the traffic, the vets and everything else. I could’ve been annoyed at this loss of free time but I turned it into positive time. The vet advised to bring her again tomorrow which throws out some other plans but this is the way we have to roll.
Something I learned today?
Talking to David over a coffee he told me new things about South Africa that I didn’t know. There are maybe 11 tribal groups in South Africa, all with slightly different cultures. Since the end of the apartheid, the ANC has ruled non-stop but corruption is rife and although overt racism has gone it still exists in more subtle ways. The government is seemingly directed by rich bankers and billionaires ensuring their money keeps rolling in. David said he has come across many more South Africans in Thailand recently as folks are getting out to seek a better future, something which is not possible for the majority. Of course, it’s far more complicated but the underlying immorality and inhumanity are obvious. Perhaps inhumanity is actually the default of humans. Humanity is only something achieved in small doses.
Which aspects do you think makes a person unique?
It’s late already and I would like to write more about this but it also seems obvious that the answer would be ‘every aspect’. There’s no getting around the fact that everyone is unique.

I took this picture because, on a valley bike ride with Bruno, he recommended stopping at this fish restaurant for me to check out. We had a small quick meal and chatted overlooking the fish pond. It was only about 2pm and the owners/staff were lazing around one of the tables. Bruno seemed to think they were high or perhaps they were just in that chilled laid back zone of rural northern Thailand. We were also greeted by an assortment of shaggy dogs and scrawny cats, happily playing, hunting, snacking and snoozing. Lazy days at the fish pond restaurant on a road off the beaten track. A ‘local’ fish pond restaurant for ’local’ people.

Fuck Spiders – 14th December 2022

4 billion years to get to this point
So fuck up, dickhead!
Pull your head in, it’s not about you
A tiny speck on a single thread
We’re not here to fuck spiders
There’s always good and bad seeds
Everything is a part of everything
The whole has everything it needs

Thank you to the Aussie vernacular.


Sometimes I would like to go back in time and punch out the younger version of me for being so retarded.

Brian Walsby, on behalf of most everybody

Today I’m feeling:
Happy but a little tired
Today I’m grateful for:
The citronella incense trying to keep the mossies away. It’s not working particularly well but can imagine we would be itching and scratching even more without it. How is incense made? Maybe I’ll try to find out….now.
Well, the site I checked said they ground ingredients, and mixed with water to make a paste but didn’t give any hint as to what the ingredients might be.
The best thing about today was:
Delicious fish, fish tofu and veggies in a mushroom hotpot soup with fresh chilli and garlic and chilli sauce. Zing.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I didn’t have any feeling of things being out of my control. That could be through passive acceptance or relinquished control. There were elements of my classes that were out of my control whilst I was doing one and two-on-one reading study with students but there was no way around that. I still managed to keep the class lightly occupied during their ‘free’ time.
Something I learned today?
I learned that the BBC published an article about a scientific breakthrough with nuclear fusion but then that seemed to be countered with lots of ifs and maybes. As with most reporting on science, the media speculates well before anything is clear. It’s frustrating that our media and our brains are even wired to accept and promote this.
What does your ideal day look like?
Imagine living the ideal day over and over. It would soon lose its charm and so I posit that an ideal day is one where I wake up in the morning, make fewer mistakes than the day before, do something different, learn something new and develop my body and mind.
I don’t have many ideal days but that’s ok. I need something to aim for!

I took this picture because I was looking for different angles to take a more interesting photo.

The Teenage Hand Hold – 9th November 2022

We held hands, sweaty palms
But that didn’t stop our walk
We circled the lake three times
Lost in the nonsense of our talk

Nervous about our steps
We never looked at each other’s eyes
We left unsaid many thoughts
For other times to realise

Could this time go on forever?
We’ll live it over until our ends
Remember that time at the lake
When we became best of friends?


Our external searching and perpetual information hunting (and hoarding) are all ways of avoiding an answer disguised as earnestly searching for the answer.

Thomas J Bevan

Today I’m feeling:
am: tired pm: happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Brian Walsby, his art and Manchild books which I’m almost finished reading having owned them for about 10 years already. We seem to have gone through a lot of similar experiences in our formative years. I guess a lot of us into punk in the early 80s all did in some way or other.
The best thing about today was:
Overcoming my tiredness in the morning and ending up really enjoying the day. Classes went well and I felt as if I was really connecting with some of the students.
Daily thought
Are we still the same as our 14-year-old selves?
I think we all carry forward parts of our youthful follies despite wisdom received since but we cannot be the same. Some of that wisdom pays off.
How would you design the city of the future?
Damn, don’t let me do that. I would employ someone who knew what the hell they were doing! This question though reminds me of the ideas of Jacque Fresco who seemed to conceive of better ways for cities to be organised.

I took this picture because it’s nice when Tangmo wants to come and play for a bit. He doesn’t play so much now, he’s not a teenager anymore I suppose.
I’ve been forgetting to look out for photo opportunities these last few days and this one is from a couple of weeks ago.