What’s Not Mine – 24th November 2022

My favourite mug smashed to pieces
Now strewn across the kitchen floor
Happened a thousand times in my mind
And so this is what I’ve prepared for


Whenever you must learn a new skill or alter your career path later in life, you reconnect with that youthful, adventurous part of yourself.

Robert Greene

Today I’m feeling:
Mostly happy, a little tired.
Today I’m grateful for:
The Bath and Body Works car freshener that lost its smell in the car but I brought it inside and shoved it in the screen door and pierced it slightly so the fluid can slowly drip. In the afternoon the sun hits it and the bedroom smells great.
The best thing about today was:
Not having to teach. Can’t complain about days like that.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I was expecting to have to teach today but at the last minute realised that I wouldn’t be able to. I hastily prepared some work for my students to do in their own time and was able to feel that I wasn’t neglecting my students or just skipping out. I doubt if most will do my work so at least I can see who is conscientious at least.
Describe your family’s greatest catastrophe to date.
I suppose this would be my father dying which undoubtedly affected things around me but as I was less than two years old I can’t say that it affected me directly at the time. It’s also not possible to say how it has affected me since as I have nothing to compare it with. I don’t think there has been anything catastrophic in my life since though no doubt some things may have felt so at the time.

I took this picture because Kim didn’t really seem to mind balancing across these parts of the sofa.

God’s Deal – 17th November 2022

It’s catching up, chasing at our heels
Kicking guts and stabbing in the feels
Lumps are growing, now we’re knowing
This is the worst of God’s shitty deals


We stand before the world, in all its majesty and torment, and say ‘we mean something’ – we, who contribute in some way toward the betterment of the world; we, who have skin in the game; we, who improve matters; we, who care. We find, to our utter astonishment, that we have faith in ourselves.

Nick Cave

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
The rain again. It’s not long since the rainy season ended but in that short time, the garden was getting parched and forcing me to water far more often than my laziness would like. But today, I can lie down and relax and watch the downpour doing the work for me.
The best thing about today was:
Taking about an hour to leave school as at every turn there were new groups of students wanting to chat. I had good conversations with many of them, my current students, my old students and even some I don’t teach.
Are you in control of your life?
As much as it is possible to be. So many factors can not be controlled and honestly, it is better that way.

I took this picture because this cutie was above the door into the bathroom at school and though the picture doesn’t show it is bigger than my hand. What a beauty.

One Cookie Now – 4th July 2022

I gave up and got nothing
Gave my choices away to luck
Couldn’t be bothered to take control
As my life has become stuck
Watching my friends so happy
Travelling to faraway lands
I lost control of my destiny
And left it in other’s hands
If only I actually knew this
The truth that others have seen
Grabbing at the nearest cookie
Never wondering what might have been


When reality disobeys my rules, detectable levels of surprise, disappointment and frustration are produced.

Allie Brosh

In confusion, a purpose in life, the choice, the problem – 20th January 2020

Morning ritual (habits)
– read Daily Stoic 365
– movement – the body should be treated more rigorously, that it may not be disobedient to the mind.
– mindfulness – meditation or stream-of-consciousness writing
– mastery – one person likes tending to his horse, another to his farm; I like to daily monitor my self-improvement.

What experiences can you invest in?
– go to school in the holidays and talk to the kids there
– arrange once-a-month free Friday learning in our classroom

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for my new pillow. It seems to be doing the trick for my dodgy neck.

Make up your bed each morning. Studies show this simple act can make all the difference in your day.

ABC article

To-do list

  • More Science of Well Being Coursera ✅
  • Prepare/check next week’s lessons ✅
  • Get photo from when teaching for TLC ✅
  • Next read-to-lead step ✅
  • At home – continue dream decade sheet ✅

Today I found out that I will be put back to CRPAO in Mathayom (high school) next semester. Joe (TLC) said that it was because I refused to do their (Anuban’s) work on the weekend back at the beginning of the semester but I’m not sure if that’s true. I feel like Joe has other agendas that I don’t know about, and that’s ok, it’s just hard to place my trust in him totally.

Anyway, it’s something that is out of the way now, I don’t have to think about it anymore. I can start coming up with work ideas well ahead of time.

Although it’s not startling news, I reacted well. It’s not in my control where they would like me to work. In the past, I can imagine being upset at what could be considered a rejection from Anuban. I know I’m OK, I know I’m a good enough teacher so I have no need to feel down about these events.

I enjoyed my lessons today as they were very simple. I will miss some of these kids and would love to watch them grow. I guess that’s part of this job.

My self-control was not really tested today. The kids were their usual rowdy selves but I didn’t shout to strain my voice. I don’t recall complaining today either though it is still hard for me to recognise.

Tomorrow I will talk briefly with Kru Noon and let her know I won’t be there next semester – maybe she knows already. I’d like to find something to give her as a gift, though I’m not really sure what.

Tomorrow is the first day of English ‘camp’ which should be pretty cruisy for us. Hopefully, I’ll get some free time back in the classroom as there are always many things I want to read and learn about.