Tag: Ragtag Daily Prompt

Failure Porn World – 6th May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Everyone is looking for a laugh
To put a smile on their face
In an upside-down world
Digging down is the safest place

Pick ourselves up by putting down
Cut down all the tall poppies
Misfortune brings us all together
So that’s what everyone copies

Fortune cookie philosophers rant
How to make a million dollars
But the need for the dopamine rush
Will never make us into scholars

A promise one day it could be you
That is the star of the show
Turnover is high in failure porn world
Clicked over to the next video

29th Nov 2024 – Shared with Ragtag Daily Prompt – failure

Today I’m feeling:

Hot. It’s hot. This is Thailand. What did I expect? The aircon stopped working in the bedroom last night and the temperature never dropped below 28 degrees. I slept fine though. Tonight I may have to sleep with the window open and have the fan next to it, weakly sucking in cooler air from the night. In the meantime, I have to contact someone to come and fix the machine.

Today I’m grateful for:

My portable hard drives that allow me to save and move files around from one place to another. When my crusty cranky old MBP stopped recognizing one of the drives I was able to swap things around and get things running again with a freshly formatted drive. I think I may be at the point now where I just don’t need any more drives. I’ve slowed down my music consumption a lot recently and I have too many movies to ever have enough time to watch.

The best thing about today was:

A general feeling of well-being. Perhaps the only thing that really stood out was riding back from Utopia and going on a convoluted path home. The sun’s heat was like a blanket around my skin with the breeze being just enough to stop feeling crispy. I slowed down a little to savour the feeling. The mountains looked like a photograph from the 70s, all washed out due to the hazy air, enough blue sky shimmering through from above to highlight the depth.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

It was time to start a new book whilst sipping coffee at Utopia so I had a quick scan of the shelves at home. I use my Utopia time to read music biographies or music-related books. Yesterday I  finished Dave Simpson’s The Fallen. Now it was a choice between SNFU or Rollins Broken Summers. I opted for the latter. As I start reading I get back into Henry’s groove quickly and easily. He’s a maniac. I respect his attitude a lot. I see parallels with myself in his words though I’m totally softcore in comparison.
As I keep reading I realise I’ve read this before and not too long ago. I wonder whether to ditch it and swap it tomorrow. However, the strength of the writing keeps me intent to follow along as he prepares for another tour of duty. I feel compelled to bring his attitude back into my thinking as I prepare for my own lovely little war in the classroom over the next couple of weeks. I need to get back to some discipline. Cut the flabby excesses of lethargy.

Something I learned today?

I’ve seen a few videos of people telling jokes to make each other laugh and if they do they lose a point or take a drink or similar punishment. Sometimes they are fun to watch. One popped up and the thumbnail looked like a guy I vaguely knew back in Sydney so I watched it and sure enough, Rodney Todd in all his afro-hairy glory!

What is something I can’t live without?

There’s nothing beyond air, food and water. Without other things, life would certainly be uncomfortable. It’s like people who lose everything in house fires, they find that their lives still go on. I’m thinking about Kim Chi today and how sad I still feel about losing her. But here I am.

Where are you, Kim Chi? Why are you not here? I miss you so much.

Sweet Lips – 13th March 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

A trickster manipulates words
I’ll collect them in my box
Register them with internal affairs
And see what it unlocks

Adding a twist of lemon
They become spat-out sour
More honest than the saccharine
Used to give them power

Everything already said
Is gonna get said once more
A constant strive for meaning
Makes a profit to explore

27th Sep 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt – lips

Today I’m feeling:

Calm and relaxed.

Today I’m grateful for:

The delicious perfume of this candle that Amy brought from Australia for me. No matter how much you try to save money when buying perfumed candles the more you spend the better the smell and its lasting effect.

The best thing about today was:

Feeling in a great mood in the morning, chatting with students and spending time with them without any rush, then spending about three hours drinking coffee and updating the blog (1983 diary entries completed) and then back to school again for more chat and some play before shopping and home.

After eating dinner though I’ve run out of steam and ready for bed before the sun has even set.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I was excited to get a call from FedEx as it meant they would deliver the SSD I needed which will hopefully upgrade my iMac and get it running again.

Unfortunately, when the delivery guy arrived he needed almost 800 baht in import tax before handing it over, adding another 40 bucks to the cost. What can I do?

I hope this all works in the end otherwise I’ll just have ended up with an expensive SSD drive and still no desktop computer.

Something I learned today?

I’ve made some lessons that require audio input from myself and the students and I went to record this afternoon but it sounds really odd when played back. There’s an option to upload mp3s so that seemed like the way to go except there is no simple way to do that without downloading new software. You can record to m4a files and then hopefully (I haven’t tested yet) can convert them in Apple Music.

I forgot how simple things can be once they’ve been set up, such as I had on my main computer and then just ran and worked forever. Now I’m back to fiddling around again to do this initial setup.

What is something I can do today to improve my well-being?

That would be the exercise I did this morning and the early night I’m about to get this evening so I can catch up on some sleep.

I took this picture because when I got home today I was greeted by this menagerie along with Tangmo and the white and black cat on the terrace. A few others in the village were investigating the herd just outside too. It seems to have grown as I only remember there being five last year though maybe he has smaller herds stashed around the village. My guess is that the aunties next door want the poop and the benefit of the jungle being kept at bay for free. Their vegetable garden is doing very well and none of the land belongs to the aunties or the cowman but it’s all for the common good.

Woke up to thunder, or was it a truck? I couldn’t hear any rain, must’ve been a truck. Wait, there it is again, must be thunder. Where’s the damn rain?
Soon my alarm goes off and even though I’ve only had six hours of sleep and feel a little achy, I’m feeling good and do my little exercises and then, finally, a little rain falls though not enough to mean I don’t need to water the garden still.
It’s still misty and hazy with low clouds too, so it’s difficult to tell if the rain has had much impact on the air quality yet.
I drive to school without rush for a change and hang out with the few kids who still bothered to come, particularly enjoying catching up with my old students, Aon, Aomsin and Wan, who fill me in with the latest classroom gossip.
It’s fascinating to see the changes in these kids over the three years I’ve known them and to get some idea of the direction they would like to head in.
Aomsin told me how the class dynamics had changed and I mentioned another class that were all good friends in grades 7 and 8 and then all split into different factions in grade 9. Aomsin said, ‘Of course because we are all growing up.’ It made me question why, when we grow up, we lose that forgiveness for our friends?

I Don’t Know – 28th February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

We’re making black and white from grey
With all the conflicting information on show
Picking a side of the fence to stay
But the smart thing is to say ‘I don’t know’

22nd Mar 2024 – Submitted to RDP – Liminal

Today I’m feeling:

Happy and tired

Today I’m grateful for:

My new yoga mat which I finally unpacked and used this morning. I only did a quick workout as I woke up with a start with my first alarm and snoozed a bit after that. I’ll not be able to keep the mat out as our cats will eventually pee and puke on it which is what happened with the last two.

The best thing about today was:

A bowl of LungChom coconut ice cream with fresh strawberries, yoghurt and chocolate muesli. Damn, I’m going to have to make sure I workout a lot these days.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I couldn’t stop myself from an afternoon nap even though as I was nodding off whilst reading and telling myself ‘getting up to exercise will stop you from falling asleep’! I’d planned to get the bike cleaned and serviced and go to Daytripper and ended up not even leaving home again!

Something I learned today?

In Denmark women are (or were in the early 2000s) encouraged back into the workforce after their children reached 18 months, sending their kids to care centres. The carers and parents all rationalised this as positive despite all scientific evidence suggesting the outcome is negative for the babies.

What were the highlights of this past month?

This month has been pretty quiet in general. It’s just been work and home. Nothing stands out but as I’ve said before I’m happy with that. No highs mean no lows. And in general, I’m riding above the median and savouring my life.

Anchan took this picture as part of a TikTok video because that’s what kids do. So, being the annoying teacher I am, I photo-bombed her, making fun of her and to her credit, she was completely unfazed and finished her mime song and uploaded it. Maybe I’ll be famous!

New Maps – 22nd February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I have the sky, you make the borders
I have a foot on the ground to stand
Watching those with their marching orders

I saw the trains roll by a-rattling
And engineers mapping new land
Over which young men were battling

As history changed it still stayed the same
New lines were drawn as planned
To remind us all of a deeper shame

Where you sit now is where you’re at
It was never special or even grand
But tall tales told will make it that

15th Sep 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt – map

Today I’m feeling:

Happy and mellow

Today I’m grateful for:

Baking soda which seems to have reduced the smell of cat pee in my mattress considerably. I may need another 10 kilos to completely fix it but hopefully, the mattress will start smelling of me and my sweat again soon.

The best thing about today was:

Was talking with a lady I often see at House who usually says hello in English but we never talked beyond that. I could tell she was quite chatty by the way she talks with Gui and today we started talking as we waited for Gui to get out of the shower (as we were technically there before he was open). Her name is Poy and she has pretty good English skills.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

My students blatantly copying work and just laughing when I point it out to them. What can I do? I just laughed with them too.

Something I learned today?

The New York Times ran an anti-China piece about how a top Chinese banker has been detained by police in China, trying to show that bad things happen there.

However, people from all around the world commented that it’s good to see a country not afraid to detain high-level officials especially if they actually have done something wrong because that rarely happens in so-called free societies as are believed to be in ‘the West’.

How have I experienced wonder or awe lately?

My life and feeling these days is quite steady and stable without the highs and lows that come with awe or negative thoughts. I was quite in awe as I did my bike ride last month as I found myself exploring new hills and valleys secreted away aroundabouts. A little bit of that was enhanced by a hit of acid but still, I was feeling awe and wonder.

I took this picture because the colour of the numerous flowers on this tree forced me to pull over as I was driving by. This is an acceptable drive-by shooting.

Big Time – 16th February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 3 Comments

Asleep on the grass forever
Amongst the trees, staring at the sky
Nothing within vision
The clouds keep drifting by

Oblivious to the tears
Or the dramas yet to come
No more sadness or joy
At the sight of the rising sun

A dot on the map
A blip on the radar, gone
A marker in the road
That we’re all travelling on

2nd Sep 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt – blip

Today I’m feeling:

Happy, then shocked, then numb.

Today I’m grateful for:

Being able to spend another day on this earth. This week’s events bring life into a sharper focus.

The best thing about today was:

Working with 1/6 in the morning following up on the work they struggled with yesterday. My plan went well and slowly, slowly, most students got a better understanding of this minor grammar point I was teaching.

It made me happy to see the kid’s own pleasure at getting it and also made me realise I need to slow up on certain points and work out better ways to present them.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

After my first class going well I was ready to grab a coffee but as I was going to the stairs I saw a bunch of primary students coming down from the floor above so I stood and high-fived them as they went past. More and more came and some students who knew me were happy to see me, particularly Nana who always comes and gives me a big hug.

As they kept coming Gun from 2/7 came running around the corner and said ‘Teacher, you know about Big? He’s gone, he’s dead!’ and off he went running down the stairs past all the primary kids.

Now, Gun is a bad boy and likes it, so I was a little bit dubious though I thought something like telling a lie like that was even below him. The last of the primary kids came down and I started behind them. On the way up were Aum and Sunwa and when they saw me they just burst into tears and hugged me. I took them up to the classroom and soon other students followed all looking sad, shocked and teary.

Gun appeared again and wanted to show me his phone. I knew what was coming and sure enough, he showed me a picture of Big, who had been hit by a car on his motorbike, his body lying at a weird angle on the side of the road. I told Gun to stop showing this and not to share it but unfortunately, pictures like this are normal here and even on the front pages of newspapers and websites. I don’t even know where Gun got the pictures from.

More kids came, some only then finding out the news and it was a very sombre atmosphere. I hung around and comforted some or just sat quietly watching everyone. I could see one or two of the boys who were Big’s closest friends were particularly distraught.

Eventually, David came and I left for my own class with 1/7 and some of them already had seen RIP pictures shared on Facebook. I took the class slowly and the kids were good today as I promised they could go early if they listened and finished the work. I talked more with a few students outside and came home.

I wasn’t particularly close to Big as he often didn’t come to my class or would skulk in late without me even noticing him but he still occupied a small space in my brain that will no longer be filled.

I feel sad that someone so young is lost like that and sad at the grief of his friends and I feel in some way his co-students are sad because they know that it could just as easily be them. Big is not sad, but we all are.

Something I learned today?

I watched a wingsuit video today of people jumping from a plane over the Maldives. Looking at the islands below it seems to me that the generic photo used to advertise the sea houses over sparkling clear blue water is right next to the airport. You could just get off the plane and walk across the runway and into one of these houses. I would guess the airport is not that busy but it also shows that the idyllic picture is not quite what it seems if you could see the full 360-degree view!

23rd Feb 2023 – Looking at a map it seems like almost every island of the Maldives has an airport so I guess wherever you might be there would be the occasional rumble of planes going by.

What song takes me back to a specific memory?

Impossible! Too many songs, too many memories. This question is suitable for a casual music listener. I’m transported to so many different parts of my life depending on what I’m listening to.

I took this picture because Tigger loves our house so much. He can lie anywhere and feel good. I do have to double-check sometimes to make sure he’s still breathing!

Together We Rise – 9th February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 3 Comments

Once again, I was told I was free
That I could be whatever I wanted to be
So I told of the things inside my head
That had filled me full of existential dread

Then I found that so many people didn’t agree
I was called out and threatened constantly
I never thought just because of words I said
Made people so upset they’d want me dead

I realised freedom does not mean free
What’s freedom to you is not so for me
A common line must be towed instead
If you wish to lie in a settled bed

But is it possible for us to agree
That opposition is the end of you and me
We don’t need to succumb to lies we’re fed
Together we can travel the road ahead

2nd Jun 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt

Today I’m feeling:

Productive if only for household chores. Not sure I’ll be able to stay awake this afternoon.

Today I’m grateful for:

An afternoon cappuccino to keep me awake through the day but hopefully not so much that I can’t sleep tonight. I went out to Daytripper to enjoy it and watch the Kishore Mahbubani online course videos about US-China relations.

The best thing about today was:

A sense of achievement from sweeping up leaves, cutting back some climbing vines, preparing for cleaning off the roof, washing bedclothes, cleaning Kim’s room and getting everything ready for her to spend her nights in here again. I enjoyed doing it all.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I’m here in Kim’s room writing this and I can see that the fuckin’ ants are out of control. I wonder if this is why the doesn’t like to sit directly on the floor. I sprayed ant killer in one corner of the room where I could see them coming and going but there must be many different colonies here all vying for their pieces of territory and the pull of Kim’s food bowl.

Kim is sitting watching me and wondering what the hell is going on.

Something I learned today?

The US voted no at the UN to make food a human right. They voted no to the Convention of Rights for Persons with Disabilities. No to the Convention on the Rights of the Child and against the resolution ‘combatting Nazism and contemporary forms of racism.’ The US sure likes to be different.

What emotion am I feeling right now?

Lethargy as my body winds down from the activities of the day. My mind though is still busy but that will soon wind down too. I also have a feeling of anticipation looking forward to jumping into bed with fresh clean sheets. My body is already experiencing the sensation, I’m looking forward to it that much.

I took this picture because new sheets, new sleeps. Almost summer.

Dark Cave Of Joy – 21st January 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

What are we doing
If we’re not shining a light?
Just scrambling in the cave
Wishing for stage exit right

No shadows in the dark
Beg for optimism’s guide
Joy is found in striving
For the way outside

undoubtedly inspired by Nick Cave’s Red Hand Files
19th Apr 2024 – Submitted to RDP Friday

Today I’m feeling:

Happy and dusty from a long bike ride

Today I’m grateful for:

The security guard who waved me on at PB Valley so that I could do and look around and take a couple of nice pictures.

The best thing about today was:

The toothless old men who talked to me in their villages and their lovely dogs coming to sniff and investigate me.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Little Fino got out of my control on a gravel surface and sent me flying over the handlebars. I handled the situation by laying motionless for a second and staring at the sky. I mentally checked my body and brains and found a few sore spots but no real harm done.

Something I learned today?

I finally learned the route around the checkpoint in Mae Chan. It’s not worth using it just to avoid the checkpoint but there is lots of beautiful land out there and I felt connected with it all.

You have three magic genie wishes, what are you asking for?
I’ll not fall for this. There’s a reason for the saying ‘be careful what you wish for.’ Has any story about having wishes come true turned out well?

  1. Any wish must not have any negative consequence for anybody or anything now or in the future.
  2. (a wish)
  3. Three more wishes, please.
    Etc etc
    Does that work?
I took this picture because this world is just so beautiful and I saw more of it on my bike ride today.

Wide-Eyed Wonder – 5th January 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Sophistication overcame impulse
Now I’ve learned too much
Buried beneath all the study
I started losing touch

Days of concentration
Lost in a world surreal
Never more sure of anything
Never scared to feel

Dig down to the core
With the passion of a child
Days of wide-eyed wonder
When I only ever smiled

2nd Dec 2024 – Shared with Ragtag Daily Prompt – surreal

Today I’m feeling:

Relaxed enough and happy. Still a little tired from lack of sleep but not enough to get me grumpy.

Today I’m grateful for:
My late students who I locked out of class. Without them the room was quieter and more manageable and I could tell the students who were there were happier too. I’m also grateful to Anchan, who seems to have become the head of the class (which she deserves as she is more mature than the others and also more outgoing), when she confirmed to their homeroom teacher that those kids were very late and always disturbed the class.

The best thing about today was:

Not sure if was the best thing but it was funny. AimAem wasn’t in class on Tuesday and today I asked her where she was and she said she was in Bangkok. I gave her an incredulous look and jokingly asked why she didn’t invite me. She talked into her phone to translate but all her friends heard her and burst out laughing. She showed me the translation which said ‘unimportant person’ I cracked up too and pretended to be upset. Everyone was happy.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

About 8 students were late for my afternoon class and when they came I’d already started the class and I told them they were too late and to leave. One of them messaged me later asking if I was upset with them as I told them I wasn’t. I told them it was their choice when to come to my class but if they are late they may miss out and the choice was theirs.

Something I learned today?

In Lithuania people don’t usually say hello to each other. I’m not sure I will ever need this information but it did stand out in a blog post I read. The thing is that they then said that they themselves did usually say hello to people. I think people in general aren’t going to say hello to everyone they pass. Nods of acknowledgement happen over time and can develop into greetings. In general I think Australians have been the friendliest people I’ve met.

What are your family’s top 3 favorite meals?

We really don’t have favourite meals as a family. Beyond Amy and I we rarely eat with the extended family and for us both we often end up eating different dishes. One thing we do like to have together though is Sichuan hotpot. Homemade is best in Chiang Rai but Sydney had many good options and obviously China and Sichuan we’re the absolute peak but I haven’t been there with Amy yet.

I took this picture because these are Amy’s famous cinnamon scrolls. She made three batches for Utopia and each time our house filled with delicious perfume. Finally she made a batch for me and her friends to eat too!

Princess Unknown – 30th December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

She made me dream
She made me wonder
She made me feel
I’m nearing six feet under

And she didn’t do anything
She just simply needed to be
I don’t know who she was
And she certainly didn’t know me

Across the room
She quietly sat
And suddenly
My world no longer flat

She stood up and walked around
And I followed with my stare
I lived a life in ten minutes
Of which she was completely unaware

So I give thanks
Princess unknown
To the thought
That you’ll never be alone

Make sure to live a life complete
My all your dreams come true
And if you never live another day
At least someone remembered you

29th Aug 2024 – Shared with Word of the Day Challenge – unknown
3rd Dec 2024 – Shared with Ragtag Daily Prompt – unknown

I was ashamed of myself when I realised that life was a costume party; and I attended with my real face.

Franz Kafka

Today I’m feeling:
Tired and ok
Today I’m grateful for:
The parking officer at the hotel in the city, who has always been nice and helpful. Amy remembers him from when she was younger and he was always nice even then.
The best thing about today was:
A night out in the city. I haven’t been here all year. It’s different and interesting to see what’s going on even though it doesn’t excite me. The main part of the city is really for tourists and I’m not a tourist anymore.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
My exhaustion from driving yesterday knocked me out until about 5pm, knowing I had to go out for the evening. I just slept and watched tv until then when I finally started to feel normal again. Now I’m giving in to the urge to medicate with alcohol, cocktails are all this old man can manage. I hope tomorrow doesn’t hate me too much.
Something I learned today?
Some new exercises for my aching hips. The pain is getting worse and I just hope I can avoid any major complications by doing some exercises. My neck has improved somewhat since using stretch bands to work my shoulders. Pain just moves around my body from one place to the next. I need to exercise everything all day if I want to maintain but who’s going to do that?
How do you feel about video games?
I like them but I’m too old for them now. My eyes can’t keep up with the action on the screen. Modern games seem to promote excitement over gameplay which is not so interesting to me. I got into video games during their introduction and watched their early evolution carefully. If I was a kid today I’m sure I’d be sucked into them. Real life is a video game.

I took this picture because I’m here with Amy for a night out and the guy in black I’d like to see break out into some D Boon licks and bouncing around the stage. But I’m afraid Chiang Rai isn’t ready for that.

They Shook Hands – 14th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Smiling for the camera
Deceptive poker plays
Air pushed in translation
No thunder today

Arm wrestle the future
Knives behind backs
Until advantage found
In what the other lacks

Back to the big oak table
For diplomatic fire
Promises made and broken
As new demands require

All the hands now shaken
To sighs of relief
Yet rendered in denial
And insincere belief

31st Mar 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt

I shall vomit back onto my contemporaries the disgust they inspire in me…

Gustav Flaubert

Today I’m feeling:
Pretty good though my students were very raucous today.
Today I’m grateful for:
The guy at the food stall who gave me a sesame-covered glutinous rice ball to try as I went out after class with the kids to get snacks.
The best thing about today was:
Getting the ironing done before Amy is back. I don’t want her to feel that she has to iron my shirts. Time went quick enough as I watched videos whilst doing them.
Daily thought
An example of good coming from a bad experience.
When going through the bad experience you feel as if nothing good could ever come out of that sick feeling. It is only on reflection that growth is recognised. Bad experiences include getting dumped and cheated on, being treated with contempt by bosses, and being made a scapegoat. To think about recent times would be how my first two teaching experiences dealing with the administrative system totally sucked but out of that I ended up where I am now where I am much happier.
Do you have a life partner?
Oh yes indeed. My lovely little Amy.

I took this picture because this is what happens when the kids take my phone to take pictures with. Bless them.