Tag: teaching

See Me Dead – 3rd August 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 19 Comments

I want to see the grief expressed
Hear the kind words manifest
Let me celebrate the life I led
To become immortal now I’m dead

You don’t need to shed those tears
I got to enjoy so many years
But being gone is a long, long time
Don’t forget me and what was mine

What wishes made, to have been said
Or ones wished retracted instead
Look on my legacy for what it’s worth
You’ll too join me soon, returned to earth

You and me, will all be forgot
Ladies and gentlemen, that’s your lot!

Inspired by reading others’ poems about grief at dVerse this week and the idea of wanting to know how others feel about you once you are gone, much like my teenage student, who, after attempting suicide, said that she wanted to see her mother’s reaction once she was gone!
12th Feb 2026 – Shared with Reena’s Xploration #417

Today I’m feeling:

Tired and a little sick with a sore throat. I slept for almost twelve hours and crawled back in again at around 11 am, after a couple of coffees.

Today I’m grateful for:

Amy told me that she was talking to a village auntie (the cowman’s wife) over the fence this morning and asked if I was teaching at CRPAO. Amy said yes and the auntie said that her son is in grade 8 and that even though I don’t teach him, she has heard that I’m a good and kind teacher.

That was nice to hear.

The best thing about today was:

Eating some nice food at Bruno and Nut’s place this evening. Even though I was feeling a little tired and sick, I enjoyed eating, talking and listening with them.

Something I learned today?

I watched an interesting video about a new DAW in development called Blockhead. Even though I don’t even use the DAWs that I have, I would still be interested in the idea of playing with them one day.

No Sense – 18th July 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

Each word written down
– On this paper, correlates
A sense of meaning

Each breath without sound
– A soft paper push-around
Sensed in silent thought

Each heartbeat profound
– Brittle paper tissue ripped
No sense of nonsense

Submitted to Monday Poetry Prompt at Living Poetry
24th Sep 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt – meaning

Posted elsewhere as a response to the prompt:

Do you have any writing rituals?

I have fallen into a habit of writing at a cafe near my school. It’s fairly quiet and with a bit of reading of other people’s writing, I am usually inspired to write a poem or two myself.

The downside to this is that I have found it more difficult to write at other times and so when it is the weekend or school holidays I have to force myself more to find the time and place to write.

I have a blog policy to only have one post a day and have been adding a poem a day for the last three years or so. Up until about six months ago, I was always a week behind with posts but since using many different prompt blogs I’ve managed to get a couple of months ahead, so posts will still keep coming even after I’m gone!

As a writer, I find it important to read as much as possible. Books-wise I pick ones that I am interested in but blog and poetry-wise I’m still refining what interests me, sometimes slogging through poems and prose that doesn’t engage me at all. That is still a lesson for myself though, helping me to define more what it is that I want to say.

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good after a slow start. I wasn’t sure which way things were going to go as I could easily have slept until 10 am given the chance.

However, I was up at 6 am and did a little testing workout and now all Amy’s cookies are gone, I’m slowly losing some weight again!

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Mai organising another two hours for me to teach on Monday morning after having that time freed up with the grade 12 HAP students off for three months training.

Initially, when I approached him about it he said that I could have free time and he was a little surprised when I told him that I didn’t want free time but wanted to teach.

The best thing about today was:

Writing and posting a decent poem that got some nice feedback. I’m starting to feel reasonably competent with my writing and getting feedback certainly helps with that.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I’m still being lazy when I get home from school and just sit watching TV.  I want to push myself more but also understand my body may not be so willing these days.

Something I learned today?

I was reminded that today is my old primary student PunPun’s birthday. I haven’t seen her for four years now and I asked her if she kept in touch with her old classmates and I was surprised to hear that she didn’t contact them at all!

Review your acts, Good and bad.

Baipad messaged me talking about flying foxes so I regaled her with information about them in the Royal Botanical Gardens in Sydney. 

She also talked about making art from animal bones and it reminded me of The Black House and I offered to take her and her friends there if they wished.

I took these pictures to send to Jan and told her that we all miss her. As you can see, Apple and Baipad are both suitably unimpressed at having their pictures taken in the morning.

The Albatross – 13th July 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 3 Comments

The crab said to the albatross
“Can you take me from here?”
“Where do you wish to go?”
Asked the albatross
“Anywhere away from these sad rocks,
To the skies!”
The albatross said “Hop in”
And opened wide his mouth
Enjoying a difficult meal

Submitted to dVerse Quadrille #203 – crab

Today I’m feeling:

A little better with my hip, though it kept me tossing and turning all night last night and so when it was light this morning, I just got up.  It was only 7am but I felt better for moving.

I had to deal with an army of ants biting my feet in the kitchen as they were retreating inside from the rain overnight.  Sadly for them, they are all dead now!

I started doing some weeding before heading off for coffee.  I don’t know why.  I just saw one and then kept going.

As I was about to get on the bike, the neighbour told me that they will concrete our drives today and so I can park over the road at Auntie’s, where there is lots of space.  Everything should be finished soon, making our road much easier to traverse.

As our gardeners were due this morning, I asked Amy to cancel them but they insisted on coming.  I guess they need money and know that we are reliable to pay them.

Today I’m grateful for:

The gardeners again.  I’m glad that they came in the end as our grass is cut nice and short again making it less likely for snakes to travel through.  From my quick inspection it seems that they didn’t manage to destroy any cactuses this time too.

The best thing about today was:

Tangmo coming to visit us a couple of times. After coffee in the morning and grabbing some Swenson’s ice cream, picking up Amy and coming home I’ve done a lot of TV watching and hip resting.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

The pain in my hip is out of my control and there’s not much I can do about it. I’m hoping a bit more recovery tonight, otherwise I’ll have to go and waste some time at the hospital.

Something I learned today?

The Swans won this week, smashing the Kangaroos by 79 points. Not a difficult opponent but good to get another win after the small loses over the last two weeks.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I met Nong Kratae at Utopia this morning and she asked me if I would come and help her once a month, as her high school-aged students need more information about IELTS study.  

I told her that I could come along one time and see what it is that I might be able to offer.

I took this picture because Piti was doing his best sexy pose this morning.

The Wild World – 8th July 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

We live alone
Our relationships symbolic
Resources for production
Or a backdrop for healing

A miracle of blindness
Debasing all else
To second-order existence
We live alone

A massive fiction of things
The wild at the margins
An intellectual sleight of hand
Of us versus them

Ignorant of our nature
Domination the goal
Trading in certainties
At a bloodied altar

Denying our relationship
We live alone
We are the pandemic
In a wolf head mask

It’s business as usual
Caught in the weave
Dualistic blindness
We chose to live alone

Possessing the wisdom
The germ of a solution
Future archaeologists found
We died alone

Inspired and borrowed from Dan Ray at Philosophy Now’s review of Ways of Being Alive by Baptiste Morizot

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good, though I feel like I’m overheating.  Not sure if something is going on in my body or it’s just leftover from pushing myself with exercise this morning.

Today should be a relatively easy day at school and hopefully I still feel motivated when I get home and play some guitar.  I totally lazed away the weekend and though I don’t feel guilty about it, I still know that I should be doing stuff.

Today I’m grateful for:

Only five students turning up to my first class.  They didn’t know where everyone else was and assumed that they were taking the whole week away from school, as from Wed-Fri, they are not at school and supposed to be studying online.

I played a Quizziz of each student’s choice for the first hour and then let them go for the second two hours of our class, so I’m back early for more coffee!

The best thing about today was:

The extra coffee time that turned out well, as I got a couple of nice poems written after doing a bit of reading and thinking.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Another one of my pens went missing today during my class with 2/7.  I’m fairly certain that it is Program who is taking them as he is always trying to steal things out of my pocket, never has his own pen and always walks around the room and near the table when I am not there.

I may be wrong but I’ve got my eye on him.

Something I learned today?

As I had some spare time in the morning, I ducked into the grade 10 English class to chat with some of the students I knew and whilst there, Kru Ren came in to teach.  He didn’t do anything to try and get the students attention and seemed to be just shouting to no one, as everyone else was either on their phone, playing games or making TikTok videos.

I just don’t get how that is going to work.  But what was weird was that meeting some of the students a couple of hours later, I asked them about the class and they were able to talk about the subject fairly coherently.  Maybe it got better after I left, or Kru Ren decided to teach in Thai rather than English, so that at least he would be understood.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I stayed back after my last class to talk with Praew some more.  I think she is a little bit of an attention seeker in some ways and I’m not totally sure what to believe.  With her anxiety, depression and being bullied in class, it is sure to mess with her behaviour.

Satisfied – 1st July 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 5 Comments

Through a process of elimination
We conquered our impulsive mind
To overcome the madness
That once made us so blind

Valley waters now run clean
Pure air fills our lungs
Meditating on our madness
Forced to review the sums

So the moon eyes open
A twinkle amongst the gleams
Falcon flight a-diving
At the fish thriving in our streams

Submitted to No Theme Thursday and Three Things Challenge #M739

Today I’m feeling:

A little bit down this morning, but not about anything specifically.  I think it was still the leftover rust from drinking on Friday.  It takes so long for me to recover now that it just isn’t worth it.

I struggled with exercise this morning but glad that I did.  I have found some videos that I might try to follow, too.  I keep going across different exercise apps, but they all want my money and for some reason I only just now realised I can just follow along with videos instead.  I’ll try my first one tomorrow.

I felt much better after my first class, my happy grade 12s and the lesson I had come up with worked well with them, so that gives me confidence for the next two classes that I try it with.

Today I’m grateful for:

My wage (again!).  Much of it disappearing already into cat food, the electricity bill and a little shopping.  A bit more will disappear tomorrow when I pay off my credit at House.

The best thing about today was:

Kru Tang roping me into helping a trio of primary students with their pronunciation for a presentation that they will give next week.  Their English is excellent already and I could only offer minimal advice.

But the best things that came out of it is that for three days next week, many students are away at these competitions so the school will be closed to students. Those not in competitions are to be taught online.

What that means for me, though, is no classes as I don’t have the knowledge or facility to teach online.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Suddenly, the power went out when I was teaching and I was assuming that it was in the whole building, school or area.  I continued teaching without missing a beat and writing on the board instead of using the projector.

Something I learned today?

At the end of the class, when the power went out, I discovered that it was just our room where it was out and so I assumed that a breaker had been tripped and now I know where they are.  

Another teacher asked me if both of the air conditioning units were on and I wasn’t sure but it made me think afterwards, what if they were?  There are two air conditioning units in each classroom, why have them if there is not enough capacity to use them!?

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I sent Baipad and Anchan a translated parable from Khalil Gibran.  It is about fear and dealing with it.  

I talked it through with Baipad who is not well practiced at understanding allegory or thinking more broadly about things.  

I hope that she understood the meaning a little deeper than before.

Spy On You – 21st June 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 10 Comments

My lizard eye spies surprise
Sideways sly spy in the skies
Explain a name, much the same
A play for fame explains the game

To beat the heat or face defeat
You gotta cheat the play complete
I did the do in watching you
So talk me through the dimmest view

Before there’s more along the floor
See what I see, saw what I saw
Split decision at the supervision
I got television with precision-vision
I got an eye on you

Submitted to Three Things Challenge #M729 and #M730
4th Dec 2024 – Shared with dVerse – TV shows

Today I’m feeling:

Not as tired as I usually am by Friday which is pleasing.  I’ve already done my morning classes again and they went pretty well.  Just my lively grade 8s to go and then off home again.

Today I’m grateful for:

The last drips and drops of my pay cheque that allow me to buy my yoghurt, that should tide me over until next month. 

I don’t have enough money to pay for Amy’s birthday dinner now and have to figure out a way to get the credit card out of her wallet on the night without her noticing!

The best thing about today was:

The many interactions with students again, mostly mine but also a few new ones that wanted to talk. 

Days like this make all the effort I put in feel worthwhile. I feel like any little small interaction is helping these kids in some way.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I have a sore spot right on the end of my tailbone. I’ve had it before and maybe it was at the same time last year. It feels like dry skin that has maybe split. It could be from spending more time sitting on hard wooden chairs or from doing more exercise at this time of year. I’m not sure. It’s more annoying than painful.

After my first class, I walked past the classroom where George was with the grade 11s that I also teach. The kids were mostly sprawled out across the floor asleep and George sat at his desk engrossed in his phone. 

Well…. That’s not a great look in my book but whatever. It seems most of the Thai teachers don’t care either. But I feel at least a little bit responsible for giving these kids as much as I can, whether they would prefer to sleep or not!

Something I learned today?

China just found a cure for Type 2 diabetes and the USA wants to stop their citizens from getting access to treatment by blocking US scientists from working with Chinese Pharmaceuticals.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

Aida was looking a bit down again today and she said that she has a falling out with a couple of her friends in the class. I encouraged her to not overthink things and that it may already be ok again by next week. 

I can feel that she thinks quite deeply about things and maybe focuses too much on the negative.

I took this picture because these fruits (or nuts) caught my eye as I got out of my car after a quick lunch coffee.

From The Tree To Me – 17th June 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

In the raw, you leave
A bitter tingle on the lips
A dusty drift in the air
Dry to the connoisseur’s nose

To grip the sweat of flesh
Where the cups of coffee sit
Hard knocks on wood
Built for many winters

All the ale spilled over
And never a complaint
Stoic and solid, ever-steady
Dampened with a cloth

How is it that your shade
Perfectly matches your function?
When your name is spoken
Your colour is revealed

Sealed with a scent
A low release of forest
Antique aching legs
Of stale cigars, whiskey and work

Write a poem about an object in five stanzas using sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch – in any order.
What is it?
This was a tough write and I don’t know if people can understand what the object is!

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good despite almost swearing when my alarm went off.  I got up and at it though and now, about two hours later, I’m wondering if I can increase my exercise time a little in the morning.  Seems like I’ve already forgotten about how tired I am by Fridays and thinking of pushing it further now it’s Monday!

(10 pm) So tired now that I’m no longer contemplating pushing myself so much!

Today I’m grateful for:

The students in the sick room who bandaged up my fingers whilst taking pictures to show that they were working when required. Fixing the bleeding farang teacher is good optics.

The best thing about today was:

My first class, 3 hours with grade 12s was relaxing and fun. I didn’t push them too much and tried to keep everyone engaged as best as I could.  I was quite impressed with their English skills and with their confidence to at least try their best.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Tokyo finally got me today and it was my own fault. 

Usually, when I’m leaving House I don’t disturb her as she is sleeping, yet eyeing what is going on but today she was on her side and raised her paw for a belly rub. 

If I had come round to her side maybe everything would be ok but I tried leaning over the bench which left my hand hovering over her until I got my balance to sit down. I know that she feels threatened by this and sure enough, she snapped her jaw around my fingers and me trying to pull away left a big gash on the inside of my forefinger and knuckle of my ring finger. 

Weirdly, it didn’t hurt that much, though I knew I should be feeling pain. Due to the location of the wounds, they soon started dripping blood.  Gui’s mum got out the medicine kit that they have to keep handy for these situations and I quickly cleaned up before heading back to school. 

I got the cuts band-aided at the sick room and went off to class.

Something I learned today?

Praewa complained about her boyfriend, my grade 8 student Ten, smoking too much marijuana! I was not at all surprised to hear this. 

She has been very unhappy since she met him and I don’t understand what his appeal is. Bad boy appeal maybe? All her friends keep telling her to dump him and she keeps threatening to.

Ten is immature and doesn’t have any parental guidance at home, living with his grandmother and his younger sister. 

I’d be happy if I never heard his name again and I usually like the ‘bad’ kids.

What three words describe today? 

Interesting
Inspiring
Tiring

Amy took this picture just before fixing up the support for the nest with an old shirt. Things were getting precarious there.

Spawn – 7th June 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 6 Comments

A serial killer, an oil driller
Hardened by wooden toys
A road rager, black death plaguer
Once were blue-eyed boys

A nasty bitch, the spiteful witch
Waving a demonic wand
A dirty washup, a wicked gossip
Once were fair and blond

Even the spawn of Satan
Was once a lovely child
Depending on the road that’s taken
Arrives either mild or wild

Submitted to WDYS #241, this picture is way too cute not to take a completely opposite run at it. That’s just the way my brain works sometimes!

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty energised and happy, coffeed up, I enjoyed talking, teaching and playing with my students (and other random ones, too).

I talked with Baipad and a couple of her classmates about the gory videos they were shown in class and told Baipad that this was a great opportunity for her to stand up for herself and make her opinion known.  I tried to convince them that their opinions are valid and whilst they may not be listened to, they have the right to be expressed.

I could see from her face that she knew this but wasn’t able to steel herself to do it.  Still, it’s early steps in showing support and one day, hopefully, she will be brave enough to stand up for herself.

The first two classes were grade 11, so they were pretty well behaved (though still have to put my foot down every now and then) and after a quick break, onto the grade 8 scoundrels who were entertaining, and, with gently prodding, made fairly valiant attempts at their reading.

As I was on my way out, I ducked into Kru David’s class and helped some of the bored and dejected students who were struggling with being asked to write a very simple poem.

As I had no pressure, I had time to explain to a couple of students what the idea was about and how to complete it, and they seemed to get the gist.  Of course, when you are the only teacher in the room, it’s difficult to get around to all those strugglers and walk them through things more simply so that they can understand.

Today I’m grateful for:

A Facebook message from my students Baitoey and Piano saying that they missed me.  I was happy to receive it, though not sure exactly why they sent it as I bump into them around school almost every day.

The best thing about today was:

A positive feeling through most of the day without any exceptional highs or best thing that stands out.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

While teaching in the new building and in the room where Kru Pooky sits whilst I’m teaching, I got a bit annoyed that she kept asking various students to go and run errands for her.

When we were about to start an online quiz, I asked her where my student was and told her that he needed to be here in my class.  I didn’t push it any further than that, but hopefully, she understood my intention.  This is the Thai way to try to deal with Thais doing things in a Thai way!

Something I learned today?

Duolingo, which I make all my students use for 5 minutes a day, has introduced what looks like a reasonably good AI chat component to its teaching practice.  Hopefully, some of my students can benefit from this.

And whilst looking at the app to see if they’ve added Thai (which they haven’t, yet they have Klingon) I found that they have added music and math, so I’m looking into the music one just for fun.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I offered Aida a friendly ear if she needed to talk to someone over the weekend.

A Few Syllables – 27th May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

All it takes is a word
A few syllables could start it all
Pick a pill to swallow
Which side of the fence to fall?

All of the grasses green
Yet muddied by the other
Pick a path to follow
Cling tight to your brother

All it takes is a word
A few syllables to end everything
They all rang so hollow
With the violence they bring

All it takes is a word
A few syllables to make peace
To calm the stormy weather
And hostilities to cease

Today I’m feeling:

A little slow still.  I felt really tired when I went to bed but then found that I couldn’t get to sleep and then when I woke up it felt like it must still be the middle of the night but it was already getting light.

I had a very dry mouth and was finding it difficult to breathe. I skipped exercise hoping to get an extra few minutes of sleep but I just ended up tossing and turning.

I was thinking about school and how Amy said that it was unfair that I was given extra hours to teach while Princess George could just walk away from classes that he doesn’t want to teach.

I was also thinking that maybe I’m investing too much time in my students and need to balance things better.  It does bring me great pleasure though and I felt happy to walk around this morning with many students, old and new, wanting to fist-bump and chat.

Today I’m grateful for:

That my first time with another new class of grade 12 students was pretty easy despite a poor standard of English for many students.

They were all excited when I asked them for ideas of something for me to teach them in English and chose things like ghosts, psychology, Naruto and NASA.  It got me up and running with many ideas which I can reuse again later for other classes.

The best thing about today was:

Teaching.  It was enjoyable and I feel like I’m pretty well on top of things though I know that I have a lot of planning ahead still.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Amy was still wound up by the builder who responded to a Facebook post that Amy made questioning his lack of professionalism.  This was the only way that she has managed to get a response from him and he was trying to transfer his anger back to Amy.

He was somewhat successful with that but her mum and I calmed her down a little and we talked more about it when I got home so that we are both on the same page with the details.

I’m not sure if we will get any refund and I’m not banking on it but we’ll give it a try and see if he has any remorse for running away from his responsibility.

Something I learned today?

Something odd when talking with a grade 12 student called S*. She told me that her stepfather is from the Netherlands and he always speaks English with her and that is one reason that her English is reasonable and that she speaks straightforwardly and directly, which often upsets her Thai classmates.

But the odd thing was that she mentioned that her stepdad sometimes showers with her and dries her off.  I wasn’t sure if I misheard what she said and she was so blasé about it that perhaps she did think it’s normal and there’s nothing untoward about it.

It was definitely weird to hear that for me though.  I will try and get clarification from her some time though.

Oh, and Southampton beat Leeds to get promoted to the Premier League which is a little treat I enjoyed.  I’m happy for my old friends in Southampton and because Leeds are the team that my old grumpy workmate Robert supported.

I took this picture because my old students are always happy to see me.  I hope I can see some of them again in high school. Me, Tonaor, Namthip, Dena, Nicha, Mei, August, Namkhing and Fah.

Straying – 24th May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 3 Comments
Pic: Jon Tyson

Cat wild
On the wall
One eye open
Preying
An ear to the wind
Poised and small
A sniff to the spraying

Fight or flight?
Movement slight
Straying
Back arched tall
Hissing
Saying

Get out of town
Or chased on down
Rolled up into a ball
No longer playing

Picture prompt for WDYS # 239

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good considering that I was dead to the world until my alarm went off this morning.  Managed some exercise and a 5-minute (what could possibly be described as a) meditation.

Today I’m grateful for:

Finding that Sydney Swans played yesterday against the Bulldogs and so I watched the Mini Match and happy to report that we pulled through for another win.  The Swans are currently well clear at the top but there’s still a ways to go.

I’m still annoyed that I can’t watch the full matches, especially this year, as we’re doing so well!

The best thing about today was:

In my final class of the day with my grade 8s I have what you might call another ‘rogue’ student.  She, Sugus, is a friend of Aida’s and has been coming to my class occasionally since last year but now she seems to come all the time.

She’s a quiet kid and doesn’t cause any problems for me but I told her that if she wants to stay then she has to do some work, to which she agreed.

Today’s class is an easy reading class and I asked Sugus to come and read for me and she did very well, better than some of my actual students!

So I talked with her some more about why she doesn’t go to her own class and if the teacher isn’t concerned about her.  She couldn’t quite describe why she doesn’t go except that she feels bad when she does.

I’m a bit suspicious that something untoward might have happened but I didn’t push it.

Anyway, I told her that she was welcome to stay in my class and she thanked me and said that my class is fun for her.  I was quite pleased about that.

It’s weird really.  There’s no pressure on her to perform and there’s no pressure on me to teach her.  With us both relaxed about it I think she will learn a lot!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

For my second class today, with the Hospitality grade 11s I suddenly found 12 extra students!  Without telling me, and without anyone telling them why they have put two different programs together so I’m now teaching students in the Japanese program too.  So much for my plans for this semester!  I guess I’ll jag everything in somehow.

Something I learned today?

Chatting with David he told me that George complained to Nancy that he doesn’t want to teach the new Integrated Program to the grade 10s and so, magically, he no longer is.  Now he only teaches grade 11 and 12.  What a princess!  

Last year he refused to teach grade 9 and now refuses grade 10.  Maybe time is running out for him.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

This evening I’m still helping my grade 11 students with their presentation homework and replying to their messages.

Did you do something difficult or challenging today?

As I think about it, much of the day was challenging (as described above) but somehow I seemed to take it in my stride.

Tonaor took this picture because as she likes to do sometimes when she sees me she says ‘selfie!’ and so I hand her my phone.