Been through all my mp3s Got them into folders Making them easier to find Tagged with genre holders Downloaded semi-legally Some, decades ago Now they are all mine Apparently so
Now I have cloud storage Folders I can share 7 million songs Are waiting for you there Music, the great healer In any shape or form From drum to vinyl to CD And now digital the norm!
Been through all my vinyl got them into plastic sleeves protection from the dust and grime that passing time it leaves Cathartic, it was wholesome remembering the time when I purchased each and brought them home when they were all then mine
And now I have a flight case with a selection waiting there to play on my turntable and with some others share Music, the great healer it is a remedy to cure or at very least bring respite as its purpose is so pure
A little better this morning. I started feeling a little better last night but crashed out early deliriously in and out of consciousness hearing the duff duff of the DJ and Amy’s screams. Amy was the last one standing, as usual, dancing on her own as everyone else retired and left.
Today I’m grateful for:
Aing and Now, who have been borrowing our bike and car but put petrol in them and got the front tyre of the bike replaced when it went flat last night.
The best thing about today was:
Reading more of this book about the Rise and Fall of the British Empire, this time about the way the British dealt with China from 1800 onwards.
I’ve read about this history before and it still makes me upset. I kind of felt smug whilst reading it this time though, knowing how the UK is fairing in the world these days compared to China.
Something I learned today?
In Vietnam, for many drunk drivers, it’s cheaper to abandon the bike than to pay the fine. Now the police are wondering what to do with them all…
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I helped Baipad with work and motivation for about an hour and a half this morning and I think she carried on working after I left and hopefully finished them all.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 21. Don’t Take Yourself So Seriously. Yeah, yeah, you’re an individual, and people have to take you seriously, I get it. But at the end of the day, we’re all a bunch of ants trying to chase the same things. Lighten up.
I don’t take myself too seriously though I do take what I do seriously.
People say I am serious but I think that it is just that I am not easily amused by many people, not adults.
It’s hard to be serious surrounded by naughty 13-year-olds much of the day and whilst it’s still easy to fall down to their level I hope I at least pull them up a little bit to mine.
I don’t mind being a clown or a fool for the sake of the kids. It makes me laugh to think of adults looking down on me for clowning around.
Searching my tiny little brain for inspiration for the prompt word ‘touch’, I suddenly remembered the lesson I taught my grade 10 students yesterday about sexual abuse.
On one of the slides I showed a cartoon boy and girl in underwear with the title ‘Don’t touch me there’ and we discussed where it was ok to touch another person without permission.
The final slide contains the text ‘Whatever we wear, wherever we go, yes means yes, no means no.’ I love hearing the kids say ‘no means no’, not just because of the meaning in this context but because NOMEANSNO is one of my favourite lyrical bands that has stayed with me throughout my life.
So this all came together quite quickly in the end and it was just a matter of squeezing everything down to 44 words for the challenge.
Today I’m feeling:
Not so great this morning. I didn’t sleep well as snot dripped out of my nose when I slept on my left and my shoulder ached on my right. Will have to get some medicine to fix me up as we have a housewarming to go to tonight.
Today I’m grateful for:
Being free to take a long sleep of recovery from about 11 am until 4pm. After taking some medicine and reading for a little bit I fell into wild and crazy dreams, stirring in and out of delirium each toss and turn.
The best thing about today was:
I haven’t felt like there was anything today that was best. I enjoyed reading some more of Thurston Moore’s Sonic Life. That’s about it for today.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Being at this housewarming is out of my control. I feel sleepy and medicine dizzy. Not unhappy but not particularly sociable.
Something I learned today?
Aing and Now, who arrived here last night for Now’s friend’s graduation had to travel by bus from Bangkok this time, with a day in Chiang Mai on the way. Money is tight for them these days and I know they appreciate our free accommodation.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
After my long sleep, I thought that I would be ok for the housewarming and drove us there through, familiar to me, beautiful green rice paddies which Amy enjoyed, especially as the sun was moving into the golden hour.
At the party though, I wasn’t feeling good and the thumping over-extended PA was giving me a headache as all-comers were slowly slipping into a typical village drunken mania.
I anticipate a couple of cars ending up stuck in the paddies later. I made my retreat telling Amy to call and I would come and pick her up later.
I took this picture because this is the view from the open kitchen at the housewarming we are at. The other three sides are rice fields too. Nice. Perhaps the wooden shack in view is the original house. There seem to be about ten or more people sitting in there, cooking, eating and drinking.
Under the weather again. Last night I could feel a slight tickle and ache in my throat as I was about to sleep.
I slept well though not enough and my alarm woke me up with a start to which I succumbed to another 30 minutes of snoozing, skipping exercise. When I got up I could feel the oncoming sore throat, confirmed by blood in my nose.
My mood was down a little too but it’s Friday so let’s go and get it done.
Today I’m grateful for:
Discovering that there is a holiday on Monday. Yippee!
The best thing about today was:
A chilled vibe at school (see below) and spending about five hours at House, reading, lesson planning, blogging and writing. What a job!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
At the morning flag ceremony, I noticed that my grade 7 classes were less than half in attendance and discovered that they were attending some meeting about a field trip. OK….
When it came to class time there were only about ten students and they told me the rest were still in the meeting.
I went to find Kru Karn, their homeroom teacher who didn’t know anything about where they were. I mentioned a field trip and she said ‘oh yes, there’s about 6 students going.’ I asked when it was and she thought that it was in the holiday. ‘Hmm’, I said, ‘that’s weird because there are more than 6 students missing from the class?’
She came to my class and talked with one of the students and was surprised to find out herself that many of the student’s parents skipped the process of advising her about their children going on the trip and, more importantly, the trip starts on Monday and is for one week!
The communication here is so crazy – no one knows what’s going on.
I said ‘Well, I guess that’s it for teaching these kids this semester.’ Kru Karn agreed and advised to start doing their grading files. And it leaves me with another day with no classes again already.
Something I learned today?
As I was wandering around Baipad’s class this morning, because my class was cancelled and Kru Ren wasn’t there, I learned that a couple of students are taking money from the lazy ones to complete their coursework for them.
It’s enterprising of the hard-working kids to make some spare cash but disappointing from a teacher’s perspective.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I offered Baipad to help her on Monday with all her catchup work. Let’s see if she gets it together to actually wake up and do it.
I helped various students in their different classes today as my own classes being mostly free time for everyone.
Kru Fluke dropped in to visit. I gave her a big smile and a hug, happy to see her again.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 20. Enjoy Small Things. I like clichés because they are true.
Over the last three or four years of self-improvement I’ve followed the Noticing Things blog (I forget the proper name), thought about gratitude every day (with a couple of exceptions) and been writing, journalling, blogging etc. All of these combined have led me to enjoy the small things.
Partly due to this, I’m not often in the vicinity of big things and things that I once thought of as big seem comparatively small these days too (the circumstance of ageing).
One thing that I was doing more of last year or the year before was savouring moments. I don’t often stop to remind myself to savour something now. I should practice that again.
I took this picture last weekend when I was getting my haircut. HoiTod makes me miss little Kim so much, almost one year now since she’s gone. Sniffle.
Good for taking an extra 30 minutes snooze this morning. I could have pushed through and got up and exercised but subconsciously I knew that I slept late last night because I wasn’t feeling tired and I was telling myself that I should rest more.
Today I’m grateful for:
Nong Na bringing us a small gift today. We invited her over again to make another contact if we need a cat sitter in the future. We’ve never needed to ask her but I think she would be happy enough to do it and she seems quite reasonable and responsible.
The best thing about today was:
I taught my grade 10s the Sexual Abuse lesson that I had used a couple of years ago. I had to adapt it a little and put in a lot of translation so that they could fully grasp all the concepts. They seemed to follow it well enough, especially the video of the Thai girl speaking out about being abused by a teacher.
They particularly perked up when we came to talk about words about sex, though they started off shyly until I asked them what about all the bad words that you are not supposed to say? Once they got the green light on that, they were off and running.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Late this afternoon I found out that there is an art event again tomorrow morning. I asked a few of my students but they didn’t know anything about it. As usual, communication sucks but I thought that perhaps I can use it to my advantage.
I came home and forgot about it though until one student contacted me, having obviously heard about the event from somewhere, asking if they could go to the event instead of class. Well, doesn’t that sound like a grand idea? But I kept them hanging and just replied ‘Maybe….’
Actually, if I had known something about it I could have prepared some tasks to at least incorporate the event into a lesson somehow. As it is, the kids will probably wander around the event for a few minutes and then go back to the classroom and play on their phones for the rest of the two hours. And so will I, except I will go off for coffee instead.
Something I learned today?
Hippos can’t swim but they can sleep underwater.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
The kids are mostly in a pretty good mood with the end of the semester approaching and I was being pulled in many directions to join and chat with different groups at different times during the day.
Before leaving to come home I usually walk around the park to see which students are hanging out there and I’ll chat briefly with the ones I know and sometimes ones I don’t know will start a conversation too.
This afternoon, Kaowfang, Miyor and Husna were walking by and Kaowfang, as always, was talking about the latest boy that she likes. Then she spotted the boy that Miyor likes and I feigned to bring him over and Miyor pulled me back.
We walked off in different directions but crossed paths again a few minutes later and Miyor went off to sit down whilst Kaowfang and Husna started telling me that Miyor was angry and upset with them. I thought maybe because we were teasing her about the boy that she likes.
I didn’t have time to get involved further in their coming-of-age quarrels but was messaged later that they were having a real problem with Miyor and they didn’t know how to deal with it. They said she was vain, self-centred and selfish! Wow! I didn’t see that coming. Miyor is a pretty quiet girl in class and I never heard any bad talk either from or about her.
I asked Kaowfang if she had talked directly to Miyor about it but she said that she would just get angry and not listen anyway.
I suggested that perhaps Miyor is upset because she just doesn’t like people talking about her, either good or bad and that maybe whilst we were playing and joking about the boy she actually felt quite serious about it. I also said that, really, it’s none of our business who she likes or doesn’t like so perhaps we can not talk about this with her next time.
Kaowfang thanked me for the suggestion. Let’s see what happens. Here I am still traversing the perils of teenage relationships.
What does love mean to me?
I find love a little difficult to define though I know it is what I feel for certain people and about certain things. Love changes throughout our lives so its definition changes.
The love I have for Amy doesn’t feel the same as the love I had for my first girlfriend (which I might hesitate to even call love now). It is also different to the love I have for my mum or my students or my home.
So what does it mean? Warmth, acceptance, understanding, kindness, growth.
For me, love also means fidelity. I think that if you cheat on your partner then you have stopped loving them. I say that without judgement as I have cheated before. When that happened I knew that I was no longer in love.
Now, having learned that I understand that it is better to break up with someone if you no longer love them, before sharing your love somewhere else. Either way is heartbreak but one is more morally acceptable for me.
I took this picture because Nong Na came and updated us on her first year at university so far.
Looking up into the darkness of the night I could have been an astronaut exploring space Tuned into the Sydney Olympics that time I could have been the one that won the race
Trudging through the muddy fields in Autumn We were as soldiers marching off to war Or on the school fields, shoes for posts We were the team with the winning score
Racing Matchbox cars down twisted tracks I will be the one praised with champagne and girls The architect of the biggest castles And a new country whose flag unfurls
But would I always come out on top With the skills that I have got? I may not know so very much But I do know what I’m not
Pretty good. I notice that I’ve been waking up before my alarm recently and with my aching shoulder meaning a lot of tossing and turning during the night along with Cap wanting the door opened a couple of times to go in and out, I’m pretty tired too.
Today I’m grateful for:
Getting new tyres on the car today. I couldn’t really tell the difference but after five or six years I guess it was time.
The best thing about today was:
Having a couple more reading classes in groups of five or six again. It’s a lot of fun even though it means leaving the rest of the class to their own devices until it is their turn.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Just as I was leaving this morning Amy told me that after my first class, I have to go and wait at the car service place until our car is ready, which is hopefully before I’m due back at school! I was looking forward to spending time at the cafe, reading and writing but I guess it doesn’t matter too much as I can do that at the car service place too.
So, after class, I grabbed a takeaway coffee, went to Mum’s, picked up Amy and with a slight detour got to the car service. It was around 11.30 by now and Amy said they thought everything should be done by 12 so we sat around waiting. I did some lesson planning for a while and then someone came and told us that everyone was on a break now and that the car won’t be ready until later.
We tried to work out what to do next as I had to come back to school and Amy was off to visit Nut. How would I get back from school to pick up the car? Amy didn’t want to have to drive back to pick me up. I figured I could get a Grab from school though that would be a pain in the ass as it is really busy around the school at that time.
Whilst we were thinking about this they said that we could pay now and it was then that Amy discovered she didn’t have her credit card and would have to go home and get it and come back anyway! So I said that she may as well come and pick me up too!
So, I don’t know if that makes any sense but all in all it was a waste of two hours with absolutely nothing achieved from that running around.
If I had been the one that had forgotten the card I would never have heard the end of it and I gently reminded Amy of this fact, taking a minute to shine in the glory of not the one being at fault this time. I’m sure this will soon be reversed by something relatively inconsequential that I will be admonished for.
So, ultimately I handled it with smug satisfaction and a little bit of annoyance.
Something I learned today?
I learned that Baipad didn’t do anything special or get any gift from her mum for her birthday which is a bit sad to hear.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I like to think that remaining calm and adaptable to the situation described above was a good deed.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 19. There’s No End Game. We, as a species, just are. Don’t try to figure it all out. Enjoy your journey.
OK, I know that we just are, life is meaningless and I am still enjoying the journey very much.
But I also think it’s ok to try and figure things out as much as I can. For myself, not for the world. I just want to figure out how to make my world the best I can and slowly I see it improving.
Fah took these pictures because my phone was sitting on my desk where she was taking notes from my laptop screen. They were a surprise to me when I went to see what photos I had taken today.
Here the shadow falls, down into the fog Eyes dead at the singing of the bells Broke by the vicious cards dealt Crawling through the sawdust of these hells
Burying bodies, ten-a-penny Stuffed men once filled with straw All now quiet and meaningless Wondering what it was all for
This is the way the world ends Not with a bang but a whimper It never would have come to this If we’d just kept things simpler
Submitted to Shay’s Word Garden – inspired (and borrowed) from T.S.Eliot’s The Hollow Men
Today I’m feeling:
Good, getting better throughout the day. I started off a little dizzy until my meds kicked in.
Both my classes were simple and the kids seem invested in a little reading and understanding. I didn’t push them but the way I structured the reading and questions definitely caught out some of the students who would generally just copy their work.
Today I’m grateful for:
Parthiban in Singapore for paying back his share for the HighVoltage/SpeechOdd 12”, straight back into our Aussie bank account, which will keep Amy happy for a little while!
The best thing about today was:
Being inspired to write a couple of poems during my break between classes. That two hours flew by today as I caught up some reading, thinking about prompts and ideas.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
In my first class we ran out of time for the last group to read because they were all struggling to understand the questions that I was asking them.
I was surprised at how quickly the time disappeared. Oh well, at least I caught about 85% of the class today.
Something I learned today?
Arwith’s band Piri Reis is supporting Converge in Bangkok in May. He’s going to try and line up a weekend show in Chiang Mai if possible too.
Either way I’d like to catch up with him if he’s here somewhere during a weekend.
What things do I like to collect?
I’ve answered this or a similar question before, answering with music, books, comics but it got me thinking a bit more about how technology has transformed collecting in many ways.
With almost everything available somewhere somehow as a digital file collecting physical items is becoming more of a rich person’s privilege.
Collecting things digitally doesn’t mean much to me but from seeing what some of the younger folks are experimenting with online in games they seem to place value in those things.
I was intrigued whilst watching an online race over three hundred kilometres on a barren planet in one of the sci-fi games where folks collect and trade minerals.
I can understand the appeal of these types of games and there may have been a time I might of dreamed of delving into them but I still have some part of me that clings to the physical.
Unlike those players though I cannot place any value in something that only exists as bits and bytes.
Praewa took this picture because she stole my phone (again). Her face is finally starting to mature as she has had a cute childish face since I’ve known her and it has only recently started changing. She still hasn’t grown taller though which I often tease her about but she could still grow a few more inches yet.
How many vapid words I read today? So much written with nothing to say Some thought many were written by me It’s true, I accept responsibility
“All the flowers shine bright in glory” The charming prince wins every story Look out everyone, it’s yet another verse Praised by all yet poetically worse!
Upbeat though could have done with a couple more hours of sleep. Still, here we are, up and about.
Today I’m grateful for:
This soda water I’m drinking right now. The third of the evening. The temperature is starting to rise a little as the mild winter fades. I’m thirsty and probably going to suffer later having to get up to pee during the night. Never mind. I’m a human being and this is how my body works.
The best thing about today was:
In my first class with grade 10s I was teaching about a topic one of them had chosen – European History. It’s nothing to do with what they are supposed to be learning about but I wanted them to suggest ideas for topics so that I knew it might hold their interest. I found a Middle Ages in 5 Minutes video and used AI to pull out ten questions from it. I grabbed the transcript to print out for the students and as I was expecting, they were quite shocked to see so much text and many words they’d never come across before.
I started the lesson by telling them that the topic is European History and to not be scared of what they are seeing and hearing. What I will be teaching them in the class is English and not history. I advised them that they didn’t have to understand everything and not to stress themselves about it.
First, we watched the video at three-quarter speed and at the end of it, the best English speaker in the class looked at me exasperated saying that she didn’t understand anything! I told her that that was fine and not to give up.
I had drawn up a list of words for them to translate into Thai to help them a little and we talked around those a little to make sure that they had found and understood the correct meanings. Then I had them do a word race, trying to find the word that I said in the text and they all got into that as it was competitive.
Then we watched the video again and, again, the students looked a little confused and lacking confidence. I told them that they are feeling like this because they are expecting to fully understand something before attempting something connected to it. I told them that that is often a luxury we can’t afford when learning something. I said that when we are young children we might watch TV, something that we don’t understand and can’t explain but the words and pictures are making connections in our brains. This is what they have been doing today. They seemed dubious.
Finally, we attempted the quiz which was ten multiple-choice questions. They needed a good understanding of English for them so I guided them with ideas of what to search for in the text, asking them questions, prompting and testing. They all struggled through the first few questions but slowly they started being able to answer them more swiftly and I stopped them at one point praising them and reminding them of how they had arrived at this point.
Usually, these students are itching to go and eat as the class is before lunch but today we ran over time as they were all quite pleased at what they had done today. Maybe they will remember little of the details of today but next time they are faced with what seems an ominous task they will feel more confident. Perhaps some will be reminded of some of the information when they see pictures of old cathedrals or hear the names of some English and French kings.
That was a great lesson for all of us today!
And then….for my second class, I split my grade 7’s into random groups of 5 or 6 and had them come read together and answer questions with spoken English, rather than writing, where it is easy to copy each other’s answers.
This really tested some of the students who think they can cruise through by copying. This is not the best method of teaching but compared with what I see going on in some other classrooms I’m hoping it is a little more effective and encouraging for the students.
I was happy with the way this class went too.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Last night Amy was in a tipsy playful mood and while I was already in bed, settled into a book, she came in looking serious. She said she wanted to talk to me seriously about something. This was a bit surprising to me as she had been happy with her wine most of the evening. I said ‘ok’, not really knowing what to expect.
Her face was serious and she looked teary and struggled to say words, hiding her face in a shameful manner. I was still slightly bemused but also on my guard. What is she going to tell me? What is so difficult to say? What happened? I was mentally and physically preparing for a confession of infidelity.
Finally, after a few minutes of this acting, she proffered ‘Do you think I should get my nose heightened? I know you like it small but I want it to be bigger.’ She laughed and cackled at this and I reminded her (as we have talked about this before) that I love her little nose but if she’s not happy with it then she can do what she wants.
She asked me ‘What would you do if I told you I had cheated on you?’ I stoically said ‘If that happened, we’d have to talk it out and decide what to do.’ Ultimately that is all that gets done in that situation whether it’s amicable or not.
Amy went off back to her wine and movie and I congratulated myself on my calm in such a situation. It was good to practice going through an emotional test like this. Occasionally, I will walk through situations in my head to see how I might react, mentally preparing. It’s not always effective but it’s better than being knocked off your feet by things.
Something I learned today?
Over the last few days, I’ve been watching more Little Chinese Everywhere videos as Yan was travelling through Iran. I learned a lot about their local crafts and was reminded of how wonderful and welcoming the people there are. I would have loved to have gone there when I was younger but I have lost the travel bug a little recently.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
With it being Valentine’s Day, as is tradition here, students were giving out heart stickers to each other and to me too. I also had some extra candies. When I ran out of those I peeled off the stickers from my shirt and passed them on to students, hoping to be sticker-free by the time I got home.
I remember last year finding these stickers in the washing machine, even weeks later because there were still some stuck on my shirt when I put it in the wash.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 17. Think About Others. Just be mindful, that’s all. We all have families, bills to pay, and our own issues. Don’t always make everything about yourself.
I believe that I am quite good at this but I would say that I do not involve myself with others lives unless invited.
I’m not a chatterbox or the type of person who charms up banal conversation to form connections.
Perhaps that makes me a little standoffish, maybe even self-centred but actually I care very much about people and what is going on with them and I will help when I can and forgive when they have their own things going on.
Miyor took this picture because she came to take a photo of my computer screen and I joked that she wanted a picture of me. I’ll try and get a haircut this weekend.
Healthier and more positive. I still have some lurking sore throat and stuffy nose but the tiredness has dissipated for now.
Today I’m grateful for:
Amy’s mum who gave us bananas from her garden and we gifted some to Auntie Sue next door when we got home. More food grows here than anyone can eat.
The best thing about today was:
Watching all the students that dressed up for the Chinese New Year event. All the primary kids looked super cute and I was particularly taken by one boy who was part of a dance group on the stage who was really into it. He couldn’t stop himself from dancing to all the other acts even after being done on stage. I like the traditional Chinese dress more than Thai.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Kru Paul mentioned today that they were having a party this week for the primary sub-director as he said she was retiring but then he went on to say that she would become the department head for English next semester in high school. Meaning she would be our boss!
I wasn’t sure if he was pulling my leg to get a reaction but I played along, saying that I hoped she wouldn’t expect good English from the students as the primary kids are better than most of our high schoolers due to exposure to so much English whilst there.
I was sufficiently intrigued about this possibility though that I talked to Kru Mai and asked him who would be the department head next semester and he said that it would still be him. He then went on to say that he’s thinking to spread out our classes next year so that I won’t have to teach grade 7s so much.
I had been thinking to mention this to him previously so I’m glad it’s already something he’s thinking about. However, anything can happen. I don’t even know if they will still want me to work there next semester yet.
Something I learned today?
I learned that Funfai is three-quarters Chinese! I wasn’t particularly surprised at this as she has stereotypically beautiful almond-shaped eyes. I often forget how much Chinese influence there is here in north Thailand.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
My grade 10s were exhausted from selling food at their stall all morning and when they turned up for my class they pleaded for me not to teach. As it was a one-hour class and I was just prepping them for their full 2-hour class tomorrow I acceded to their demands. They promised me that they would work hard to complete everything tomorrow.
I took this picture because I took these girls’ phones from them as they weren’t concentrating on doing my work. As I did this BB, on the left, grabbed my phone off my desk and took this selfie with Tulip. I got my phone back and then proceeded to fill Tulip’s phone with hundreds of random photos as punishment.
Sore. My back and knees are complaining after stressing them yesterday whilst cleaning out the sink drain.
Today I’m grateful for:
The parking guys with their whistles at Makro. I don’t know why they are necessary or why they blow their whistles so much as it’s impossible to understand if it means anything. I almost ran the guy over because I had a clear reverse behind me and he was the only thing in the way!
The best thing about today was:
Spending a few hours in my room, catching up on reading, sorting music, downloading and listening and then practising guitar. I want to spend more time doing this but I still don’t really enjoy being in that room anymore.
Something I learned today?
The average age of a Ukrainian soldier right now is 43!
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I followed up with Earn, asking her the same question as I did about six weeks ago – Tell me five things you like about yourself. Her answers are better than last time. Less focused on looks and more focused on feelings and emotions.
What is a happy memory from my childhood?
I’ve lots of snippets of memories that are not particularly happy or sad, just things that happened. Some may have felt ecstatic at the time such as playing football at school or tragic like the time I cracked my eyebrow open on the edge of a step but at this distance, they are just events. I consider my childhood to be memories until I was about halfway through middle school, pre-pubescent. After that, I consider myself a teenager until I was forty!
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 11. Lead the Way. When you find yourself in a situation where everyone looks at each other, it’s time for you to lead. You’re a leader when you decide to become one. There’s no initiation or a title. Just a decision.
Before going through teenage depression I thought that I could be a leader. After that though, I mostly wanted to keep my head down though I still had a selfish streak of arrogance which popped up from time to time.
Whilst doing DIY punk things in Sydney I never felt like a leader but did hope that I was an inspiration for others and I can think of two friends for sure who did take something from what I was doing and ran with it themselves.
Now, at school, in Thailand, I consider myself the same. Not as a leader but as an inspiration. I want to inspire my students to become the best of themselves. I don’t work for prizes and awards and I don’t want to be managing other adults. I don’t want to lead people in such a way as to tell them what to do. Rather than leading I just want to be doing something. Anything. Just do it.
I took this picture because this was one of the few super cute kittens that were jumping around, playing and sleeping on this spirit house at the Night Bazaar last night.
Positive and happy this morning. A little bit of that Friday feeling despite being a little tired due to a crazy pee dream that was trying to wake me up. I was so aware that in my dream I was even telling myself that this wasn’t just a pee dream but just that I was peeing in my dream. I was trying to convince myself to keep dreaming.
But eventually, it was too much as the bucket I was peeing into starting overflowing even after emptying it one time. I groggily got up to go to the bathroom hoping against hope that there were still many more hours to sleep but getting back to sleep was difficult because I kept thinking about the dream.
Predictably, it felt like as soon as I got back into a deep sleep my alarm went off.
Today I’m grateful for:
A few folks taking the time to comment on a couple of poems that I’ve written in connection to some prompts. I’m at the stage of looking for prompts in other new places for inspiration – though I’m rarely ever short of ideas to be honest. Just looking for a bit of variety and some more challenges. By taking part in the prompt challenges it is bringing new people to come and look at this blog, which I appreciate. I’m not particularly after clicks or likes.
The best thing about today was:
Four hours sitting, writing, thinking, drinking coffee.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Two students, Kwang and Pang, pushed me too far today. I wasn’t angry and not outwardly upset but they have both shown me a lot of attitude recently.
I like them both and I’ve tried to help them more than other students and I’m sad to feel disrespected by them after all the chances I’ve given them. We’re near the end of this semester now and I’ll tell them not to bother coming to my classes because I don’t want them disturbing everyone else.
I just told them to pack up their stuff and go. The class was much better after that.
Something I learned today?
Pigs can’t look up into the sky due to the anatomy of their neck muscles and spine.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
Nomsen came to class this afternoon looking a bit frazzled and her friends told me that she’d been crying and she quickly covered her face as more tears came. Without making a fuss I left her to it with her friends.
I was asking students random questions about music and instruments and I came around to her when she had stopped crying but she was obviously thinking about something else. I was guessing it was about a boy. She soon asked to go to the bathroom with her friend and I didn’t question it like I might do at other times, thinking maybe she’ll feel better when she gets back.
They were gone for about 30 minutes I’m guessing, and when they got back they caught up with their work as quickly as they could. When Nomsen came to hand in her work she seemed better so I asked her what happened today.
She was quiet at first so I asked if it was about a boy and she shook her head and offered… ‘it’s my uncle…’ Oh no, I thought, maybe he’s in hospital or died, so I said ‘I’m sorry to hear that’ and gave her a hug.
On writing this I’m worried that she may have meant something else by her comment but I really hope not. I just messaged her to see if she was feeling better and she said she’s ok. I hope so.
I took this picture because two new pups were outside the gate this morning and were friendly. Tangmo came running over and lots of play fighting ensured and he got so happy he ran at full pace around the teaching room three times without stopping.
1994ever 