You Are The Key – 17th October 2024

Cultivate your garden
On the revelations of loss
A flower to push on through
The weeds you’ll come across

Are you terrified of the rain
Or love rolling around in mud?
Either way, stand up again
To see roses made from blood

There always was a before
And there will be an after
For every tear spilt
Endless hours of laughter

You can hold onto your pain
Keep it safely in a box
Remind yourself now and again
Of this healthy paradox

Inspired and paraphrased from this post at Spinning Visions

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Today I’m feeling:

A little blurry in the head, though fairly happy too. Waiting for the coffee to kick in!

Trying to write a poem and started off with two killer lines and then coming up blank on anything else! Trying to think but I’m lost in the fog at the moment!

Finally, the coffee started working and I went for a third cup and I should be able to fight off the urge to nap this afternoon!

Health:

Physical: 7
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

Not napping! I was tempted but forced myself out to my room to get up to my usual bullshit there. Listen to music, download comics, add blog entries and play guitar.

The best thing about today was:

Playing guitar along to Archers of Loaf, the Wipers and SquirrelBait, whilst a little under the influence of a weed brownie, had me now imagining that I was actually quite good on guitar. I’m not but it sounded good at that moment!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I braved the rain on the motorbike this morning to go to Utopia, as Amy didn’t want me to use the car yet. Thankfully, it was the end of the storm and just a little drizzle and by the time I came back again, the sun was out.

I also stopped and chatted with Aum Aim while she was working at her mum’s stall. She proudly told me her grade when I asked her – 3.85.

I’ve been thinking about my grading a lot this week, since fielding questions from students last weekend. I think I will be less serious about grading for the high school kids from this semester. The grades they get can seriously affect their options when it comes to university choice in the future.

It seems a bit petty to give an average grade to an average student who isn’t in the English program and whom I only see once a week. If they show willingness, I just give them a good grade, regardless of their skill level.

Am I submitting to the foibles of the Thai system?

Something I learned today?

Anchan told me that despite her being sick, she was in Burma to visit her mum in prison, perhaps the only chance she will get. She said it was dirty and crowded there.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

Anchan also told me that she can get back to Chiang Mai from Burma and she will be a little better looked after, food-wise, until she has to come back to school next week. She asked me for money again but I had to deny her this time. I’m happy to help her a little bit but I don’t want her to think that I’m just an ATM.