Tag: tenzenmen

She Is Waiting – 26th July 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 11 Comments

She is the lone wolf
Waiting for the summer mist
To rise from the forest floors

Her thoughts are her own
Serving no masters
Comfortable in quietude

Ears alert to opportunity
Sniffing out the rats
Deadly silent stalker

She is the lone wolf
Waiting

Submitted to WDYS #246 and dVerse Quadrille #204 – summer
26th Sep 2024 – Submitted to Word of the Day Challenge – stalker

Today I’m feeling:

Tired still and not particularly excited for my classes, knowing that many students will be missing for various reasons, disrupting my plans.

I got up ok this morning but feel a lack of energy and my eyes are a little blurry still.

Onwards we must go!

Today I’m grateful for:

A bit of a chilled, busy day due to circumstances described below.  I’m still pretty tired at the end of the day but was expecting to feel much more exhausted after six hours in class, then dashing home and soon out again to the airport to pick up Amy.  I’m looking forward to sleep but also feeling satisfied with the day.

The best thing about today was:

Falling into the rhythm of the day with only 14 out of 35 students turning up for my first class.  The rest were mostly off doing projects and special meetings.

As the class was due to do presentations, this has to be delayed until next week.  I figured I’d try to do some pronunciation work with the few students in attendance and settled on a 90-question Quiz about the pronunciation of past tense ‘-ed’ verbs.

At the start, everyone was quite competitive but with so many questions, once they started to understand the rules for this grammar point, they all started deliberately choosing the wrong answers to wind me up.

Suitably satisfied I stopped the quiz halfway and let the kids relax for the rest of the time.

And so it went on, in my next class, about 8 or 10 students were off doing something (which luckily I heard about yesterday and had prepared for) and I did a really simple reading, translation and quiz with the predominantly J-Biz program students.

I even managed to dash off to House for a quick coffee and writing catch-up before my final class with grade 8s and a tough reading challenge for them.  I was pleasantly surprised at how well they handled it.  Not with the quality of their reading but the fact that they’ve become accustomed with doing what I ask and feel comfortable that I will assist them.  It’s a win as far as I’m concerned.  If they can’t improve their English, at least their attitude to difficult tasks will improve.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I’ve been a little frustrated with waiting on covers for the SpeechOdd/High Voltage split 12”, which Parthiban arranged with Talib in KL.  Talib has been out of contact for a few weeks now and I’m sitting on a stack of currently unsellable vinyl until I get these covers.

There’s not much I can do and Parthiban is also frustrated and decided not to work with Talib again.  Hopefully, the situation resolves soon.

Something I learned today?

I read an interesting piece about how Buenos Aires was richer and more culturally advanced than any other American city in the early 1900s until the Great Depression, followed by a series of political missteps, which saw it lose its status.  There was even a phrase, ‘To wish to be as rich as an Argentinian!’

Review your acts, Good and bad.

Even after my long day of classes, I dropped in on Kru David’s grade 9 class and helped Nicha, Yurin and Tankoon to understand what was required.  It felt good to help them and they showed their appreciation with their thanks.

I took this picture because Freya didn’t understand why I was saying ‘Sadako’ when she was fixing her hair, so I put the picture up on the screen and made her stand there too.

No More However – 4th January 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

There’s no more debating
The words that you’re stating
Broke down my defence
Pushed me off the fence
There’s no more however
I’ll live this truth forever
No more other hand
A line in the sand
Fighting the good fight
Confirming I am right

Having said that though
No! Tell me it ain’t so!

Today I’m feeling:

Positive and happy though also a little saddened at some circumstances that arose last night when Amy’s brother and girlfriend came to visit.  Things are happening in the family space that are a little upsetting for Amy and she is quite bothered by them.  It feels like another thing to push her away from Thailand unfortunately.

Today I’m grateful for:

Funfai again as this morning she presented me with a big bag of almonds. 

One of her quirks tickles me in that when she doesn’t know the answer to a question she says ‘I don’t know’.  This may not sound odd when written down but it is sometimes quite difficult to get people here to admit that they don’t know something.  Often they will just give some bullshit answer. 

I’m glad Funfair happily admits not knowing things though.  To me, that shows a desire to learn, or an acceptance that it is ok not to know everything.

The best thing about today was:

Teaching this extra (grade 10) class.  I found out in the morning it is a pretty good class including many of my old students so it was good to have some familiar faces there because that made me feel comfortable, which in turn made the other students comfortable too. 

I’d put together a quick reading and writing lesson in the morning and wondered if we would have enough time to do it but they pretty much breezed through it and were happy to be corrected on pronunciation.  It’s a stark contrast to my grade 7 class in the morning which was like herding cats as usual.  I enjoyed both classes in different ways. 

I’m quite happy to have taken on this extra class despite it meaning extra work for me.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I still didn’t get paid yet and had to beg money off Amy to put petrol in the car.  I’m down to 61 baht in the bank and 40 baht in my wallet.  I’m taking this as an opportunity to be frugal and make do with what I already have.  Except coffee.  That is on credit, thankfully, though I hate doing it.

Something I learned today?

In Switzerland, it’s illegal to own just one guinea pig because they’re social beings and get lonely.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

This morning Paen messaged me asking if she could come and join my class with the grade 7s.  The reason being that she is developing a friendship with Praew and wants to see if she will be her girlfriend. 

As I didn’t really have much planned for the class except some Quizizz and as I’d like to help Paen make a new friend or girlfriend I allowed her to come and sit and help a little too. 

Both Praew and Paen were happy to have this chance to be together.  Paen has struggled with friendships with her peers so I’m hopeful that making friends with a younger girl could work out for her.

Are you a doer, a maker or a leader?

Out of these three choices, I reckon I’m a doer.  I’ve always been an advocate for doing something, anything and I still follow that line of thinking.

My doing recently involves the challenge of presenting a poem every day.  I’m not sure how long I have been doing it now, maybe it’s two years already.

Also, trying to go back and add information to this blog about the past is a monumental and endless task which is the kind of stupid thing I like to get into.

Previously, in the absence of anyone else doing it, I started the record label, organised shows and tours and shared the information to help others to do the doing too.

Part of that crosses over to being a maker, as I made part of the Sydney/Australia/Asia music scene and am still involved in that, though not as relentlessly as before.

As a teacher, I hope that I am helping in making responsible adults and this also crosses over to being a leader.

I don’t play well with adults and have no desire to lead them, to lead a work team or the like but seem to have fallen into being a de facto leader for my students.


I took this picture because Nudee and her friends were trying to make TikTok videos after they’d finished my classwork. I was outside the classroom and this picture was actually taken through a highly tinted window (it’s very difficult to see inside with the naked eye) so I was surprised that the picture even came out so well. Ironically, the girls were all too embarrassed to have their picture taken and I grabbed this shot before they put their hands up in front of the camera. Nudee likes to wear colourful contact lenses which make her eyes look amazing. She also has a lip-piercing which is prohibited by the school rules (hence the mask) but I have seen many kids flouting it recently and I like it.

Haunted By The Living – 27th December 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

She’s forever standing next to me
Begging me with bitter sad smiles
Everywhere I turn, the memory
Kept as treasure in my mind’s files

She’s out there still, ten thousand miles away
Taunting me with her continued silence
I only wish that there was something to say
To return her back to this lonely island

Some parade photos. Students and teachers had been at school all night preparing costumes and make-up. What a palaver, my mum would say.

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good and looking forward to the sports day event so that when I got to school I surveyed the parade for all my students, many of whom were difficult to spot as they were dressed up so fancily that I couldn’t recognise them at all! 

I slept badly because of my aching shoulder and woke many times laying on my back and when Amy didn’t stir after I exercised I shook her foot and she complained of lack of sleep too due to my snoring.  It’s possible the exercises I’m doing are aggravating my shoulder too much and it is not recovering from whatever stress or strain that I have given it.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kwang, Premier and Program again.  I spotted them in the parade and they grabbed me and insisted I walk with them which I did for a little while.  As Premier and Program let go, Kwang still held on and out of the blue said quietly ‘I miss my dad.’ Sigh.

The best thing about today was:

The feeling of excitement and happiness in the whole school celebrating sports day.  In the past, I’ve usually left after an hour or so and gone home but this time, with an hour and a half break at House I stayed until around 2.15pm. 

I was on my way to leave at around midday but got sucked back into staying and ended up trying to find Funfai whilst other students dragged me around to watch all the team’s cheerleader routines, partly because I had an umbrella they could shelter under.

Something I learned today?

Listening to the You Don’t Know Mojack podcast today, they were interviewing Chris Shary who is an artist that works with The Descendents and All.  What was interesting was how he was a high schooler in Ipswich, UK and hung around with the Stupids, even singing with them near the end of their run.  Pretty much useless information but of a little interest to me in discovering more about how everything is interconnected in our little weird music world.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

Congratulating everyone who had dressed up for the day.  Encouraging others to cheer and do their best in their competitions. Commiserating with the few who were bored or cold whilst waiting for things to get going.

What was the biggest risk I took this year?

Lending $1600 to Ad Interim so that they could get their album made.  I only knew Max through acquaintance but I liked the band’s music and made the deal for repayment within 12 months and he was good enough to get it paid off within three or four months.  I’m happy to work with people like this.  I can’t offer a lot when it comes to marketing and distribution but can at least support artists with funds for production.

Do you think that most people are doing the best they can?

I borrowed this question from The Red Hand Files where Nick Cave simply replied with the answer ‘No’ which surprised me a little and made me consider why he replied that way.

Even though it seems that there is only tragedy in the world and so many bad people acting in bad ways when I look around my own personal environment I believe most people are doing the best they can.

We can all do better, and all try harder, I guess (maybe that is why Nick Cave answered no to the question) but here, for many people, they are still struggling to get by.

Maybe it’s the difference between living in a first-world country and a third-world one.  Maybe in a first-world one, we expect more of each other and in the third-world folks are doing the best they can in the circumstances.

Bebe took this picture because she grabbed my phone and I just let her take as many pictures as she wanted. I like this one the best because Baibua has a big smile which she doesn’t usually show for me. Namfon, in the middle, has become a favourite student of mine because although we both know she may never be good at English she will now try her best and that is the main lesson to learn. Bebe is on a similar trajectory but still gets very distracted in class, though usually in a way that cracks me up. It’s hard to assert authority when you are laughing so much yourself.

Carcasses – 8th October 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Held together with string
These bones are grey
No more gifts to bring
And just empty words to say

Thrown onto the pile
Then deleted
A last goodbye smile
Broken and defeated

Whilst wheels are turning
They often roll on clear
And all the bridges burning
No longer bring the fear

Not meant to thrive
And natural to decay
Barely kept alive
Forever felt this way

inspired by this post at Spinning Visions about the changing relationships of friendship over time.

Today I’m feeling:

A bit more lively at first but after an hour or two there’s some aching eye muscles. Again, tired but not sleepy. I have things I want to get done this morning though so I’ll push on through.

Today I’m grateful for:

Aing to come from Bangkok and take care of our cats for a couple of weeks whilst I go to Australia. Amy and I both appreciate that a lot.

The best thing about today was:

Chatting with Boss and Noey over coffee this morning.

Playing guitar for an hour again.

Dinner at Mana Mala with Aing.

All equal and taking up a majority of the day.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Time feels like it is flying out of control at the moment and I’m wondering what I will have to drop in the future as I don’t think I can keep going like this! Just stay flexible and ride the wave wherever it takes you.

Something I learned today?

Both Noey and Boss (at Utopia) broke up with their partners recently. Boss seemed a little down today so maybe he’s still dealing with it but Noey said she was over it a couple of days after the breakup. She also says she’s not that interested in finding another boyfriend and that most boys here are too short for her!

What is my deepest hope?

Ridiculous I know but I vote for the old-fashioned world peace. I mean that is my ‘deepest’ hope.

Other hopes are for personal health, happiness and satisfaction. Likewise for my friends and family and then outwards from there to the rest of the world.

I have a minor hope that Amy will be happy back here in Thailand for a while at least.

Hope both our cats can stay healthy for another ten years.

I can control some of these things to a small degree and won’t be disappointed if something out of my control sees these hopes dashed. 

Did you have any bad ideas this year?

I reckon I have bad ideas every five minutes but now I’m smart enough not to act on them. 

There’s not been anything that stands out on initial thought. I also haven’t really been attempting anything unusual or challenging that I might regret.

Maybe some ideas could have been executed better; I’m thinking about the record label mostly here. As I’m a little bit out of the loop with things going on around the Asian music scene it’s getting tougher for me to know who to promote to.

As I’m writing I’m getting a crazy idea to do a 7” for my friends in Stacked State as they are just about to release a new CD. That may be a bad idea financially but it’s not about the money.

I took this picture because P’ti is happy keeping guard in the shop window. I wish our cats could be so comfortable around other people. Coincidentally, check the picture from October 9th 2022!

Making Happy – 16th September 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

Here lies the glory days
The laughter, love and pains
Stashed ragged in a box
A jumbled collection of remains

Dried disintegrated flowers
Scattered at the grave of who I’ve been
Now forever falling forward
Towards whatever I wish to dream

Once I came back to visit
But couldn’t force myself to stay
The memories are happier now
And I’d like to keep them that way

inspired by this post at Spinning Visions blog

Today I’m feeling:

Tired from a long reasonable sleep. My body is aching from all the exercise this week so I’ll happily give it a little break. No plans in particular for today though I might watch the AFL replays as they should be good games. I’ll get some reading in today as I skipped it a lot this week, running out of time and energy. I need to pick up the guitar too. Suddenly I’m filling a relaxing day but at least there’s no real stress right now.

Today I’m grateful for:

A dreamy afternoon nap, spacing in and out of the jazz core podcast. Is that weird? I remember one time as a teenager Jez came around and he couldn’t believe I was sleeping and listening to Crass’s Yes Sir, I Will album cranked up and to be fair I wasn’t in a deep sleep but spacing in and out. I guess I’m well-practiced.

The best thing about today was:

Drinking late morning coffees and getting a super buzz off them. I contemplated a third but managed to restrain myself. I wish I could drink endless coffees without getting so jacked up on them.

What is it that makes you a weirdo in your space?

To answer this I might have to figure out what ‘my space’ means. In fact, I might be considered a weirdo in any space these days. But I’m projecting that onto other people. I don’t think of myself as weird at all.

My space as a teacher: not just as a teacher but as a teacher in Thailand. By being a foreigner, that immediately makes me an anomaly. We are treated differently by other teachers and students alike.

My style of interaction with the teachers is relatively normal but I am one of only two teachers I ever see engaging with kids outside of class. This could also contribute to how the students treat me differently too. 

They don’t show the same respect but they are more interactive at least. I don’t see myself as being on some kind of untouchable pedestal that this status could afford. I’d rather connect on a more friendly level. That means also having to deal with all their emotional ups and downs and behavioural issues as they are navigating their teenage growth. 

What the Thai teachers think about my style of interaction with the students I have no idea or particular interest. I’m doing the best I can with the little skills I have and if it improves my student’s lives in any way then I consider what I’m doing to be positive.

My space as a music supporter: as demonstrated with tenzenmen I have a broad range of musical interests and whilst this makes for an unsuccessful business model I don’t wish to be defined within a limited genre because that’s just boring to me. Some people get it. 

As a person that was in the middle of a ‘scene’ in Sydney, I was also, somewhat purposefully, separate from the other people involved. In many ways, I just didn’t want to deal with all the personal bullshit going on in their lives or share any of mine. Our interactions were intentionally just involving music and getting that out there. I felt that about 80% of the people were my friends whom I could trust if I ever needed but always managed to keep myself in a situation where that need would never arise. This didn’t make me close friends in their eyes but it did for me.

My space as Amy’s partner: Amy may consider me a weirdo in many ways but she understands my aesthetic and ideals whether she understands my interests or not. 

For other people outside our relationship, I don’t really know what they might think about me as an individual but they are often confused about our relationship. For Amy and I, it is not confusing at all.

Many of her friends do not understand how we can trust each other and maintain our relationship when we are not together but that is hardly a statement on us and says more about them.

My space as a father to Hayden: I guess I’m not particularly weird in this space. I have never been much of a hands-on controlling kind of father and therefore have not been particularly stressed about his growing pains and even when it has been frustrating to watch him make mistakes I have always trusted that he will find his way in the end and slowly he seems to be doing that. I may be wrong but I feel many fathers deal with their sons in the same way.

There are other spaces I fill too but these feel like the main.

What would make today great?

Well, the day is almost done and it was a standard good day without anything particularly great occurring. It was great that the rain that threatened all day managed to hold off until I had brought the washing in. Small wins.

Noey took this picture because I got up late and Utopia were wondering where I was. That’s nice to be appreciated as a customer or even as a friend.
Fatman report

Sanctioned – 11th July 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

No bombs dropped 
No drones deployed
Bloodletting stopped
Society destroyed
A silent terror
Stalks night and day
Without error
Slowly eating away
Bloodless coups
To change regimes
No power to choose
Economic dreams
For years to suffer
To wither and die
Each breath tougher
A silent cry
A subjugated state
Media silence
Returns tenfold hate
Brewing violence
Order dies alone
Then the lies reveal
The war comes home 
Melting beams of steel
All the machinations
The manipulators
Warred with nations
Hate generators

Today I’m feeling:

The morning went fine as I had no class and the kids in the playground were all chatty and playful so I felt pretty good hanging out at House drinking coffee. I went back early to get some paper ready for my first class to make origami hearts and that went well and everyone had a good time. For my last class, I prepared a nice little Quizizz lesson about Japan in preparation for Friday’s Japan theme. Sadly things didn’t go well. Twenty minutes into the class and about 12 students hadn’t arrived so I marked them absent. I sent a message to their homeroom teacher who said that six students were helping her. Well, thanks for letting me know. When other students finally arrived I told them that they were marked absent and could leave if they wanted. Some did. Fuck them.

From here the students that were there were already rowdy and got more so as the lesson went on. They were mostly spread out all over the floor, rolling around and playing. I kept my cool as long as I could and we got to the final question of the quiz where the students had to write two things that they learned. When they just started writing nonsense I blew it. They had already been crying to leave early so I made them wait until the actual end time and told them they would have to do the whole quiz again within the next 24 hours and answer the question properly.

I left school bewildered and pissed off. Even the younger kids are more together than this class. And why do I let it bother me? Like I said above  ‘fuck them’ but really I can’t help myself. I want to try to make it better. So I have to find a different way. I’ll think about it more this week.

Today I’m grateful for:

The one or two students in that class who were paying attention and trying their best. I’m glad to see that some of them have some awareness about what is going on around them though they feel just as helpless as me.

The best thing about today was:

My first class making origami hearts was a lot of fun. I told them that they could write inside who they wanted to give their heart to and that caused a lot of frivolity. As they finished making them I handed back ever smaller pieces of paper to see how small they could go. They all accepted the challenge eagerly.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

While I was drinking my morning coffees Amy messaged me that her cousin (?) Boom had died. He had gotten sick after exposing himself somehow to some strong insecticide which started eating away at his legs. He was given medicine to help but apparently decided taking multiple doses would cure him quicker but sadly it fucked up his internal organs until they gave out. I’m not sure this is the full story but the sad thing is that it is possible he could have survived if he had money to pay for ICU for longer. Unfortunately, he had a bad habit of being spoiled by his family and had frittered away everything that they ever had. I don’t think people deserve this fate but some people certainly don’t do anything to help themselves.

In the back of my mind this afternoon, whilst struggling with my class, was having to go to the temple, possibly this evening but thankfully I don’t. I’m still feeling tense and annoyed. It looks like I will be able to go on Friday late morning as it is nearby. That’s better than having to go after the work day.

Something I learned today?

I read and learned a lot this morning but now my mind is full of saltiness. I look forward to waking up more positive tomorrow.

What does it mean to be wise?

This morning I heard a great line from Gino Jevdevic from Kultur Shock. It went along the lines of, to be old and wise you must be first young and stupid. I guess that’s no guarantee but perhaps feels like a requirement. So people seem to be wise already in their youth. Something innate for a special few though no doubt they themselves may not see it that way.

To be wise? To understand oneself, to understand the world as best as you can and for that understanding to bring contentment.

When was the last time I showed perseverance?

I think I show this quite often. For example, I will persevere with this annoying class of mine even when my thoughts are of just giving up on them. I will try to find a way to make it work for them and for me. 

I’m persevering with guitar playing despite very slow progress, same with learning Thai. I have kept going with tenzenmen for 20 years already through various ups and downs. 

I’ve persevered with writing here on this app too, almost a year now, so this sentence is an example of the last time I showed perseverance,

I took this picture because the sun was playing crazy with the tops of the clouds and this storm that threatened blew away somewhere else.

Phobia – 3rd May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

What are you really afraid of
When you’re afraid of what you’re told?
Are you really afraid of
These things you can’t even touch or hold?
Or are you afraid that your dreams
Will crumble at the lies that you’ve been sold?
Keep those dreams beside your bed
Unable to sleep on your mattress of gold

Today I’m feeling:

In the morning I was tired from getting up too early so instead of an afternoon nap I went for a morning one instead!

Today I’m grateful for:

All the artists and musicians I’m currently working with on upcoming releases for tenzenmen. Things have slowed down but I’m still happy to be helping musicians make music that I really enjoy.

The best thing about today was:

Wanting to play guitar. I just haven’t had the feeling for this past month though had been forcing myself every couple of days even if just for five minutes. I did about ten minutes in the afternoon but then felt compelled to pick it up again in the evening.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Eating lunch at the restaurant I was happy with green curry salmon and a side dish of cabbage in fish sauce. I was enjoying the spicy sauce and went for a spoonful of the cabbage which I happily chewed up like the cows outside my kitchen window, grinding the vegetable into a swallowable pulp. However, the chilli suddenly induced a sneeze which I managed to catch with my hand without too much damage. But then I felt another coming and I stupidly tried to hold my nose which didn’t have the desired effect of killing the sneeze. Instead, the sneeze manifested and forced air out of my mouth along with its contents! Chewed cabbage pulp hit my hand and sprayed in a wide arc over the table and onto the floor. I quickly tried to clean myself and the table, thankful I don’t think anyone saw what happened. I picked up pieces off the floor after finishing eating trying not to show any guilt. I think I got away with it though I’m giggling and embarrassed at the same time.

Something I learned today?

Today I learned that it is Cap that pees on the folding mattress as I caught him in the act. All this time blaming Tigger; though I had my suspicions. Amy was concerned when I told her as this behaviour is often a cat’s way of saying there’s something wrong. After coffee, I can back and set up the litter tray and stick him in it and he started peeing immediately. I put a tissue under him and could see that there was no blood which is usually an indicator of some problem. Then he went and sat at the sliding door and looked out at Tangmo who had come into the garden when I came home. It was then I realised that yesterday Tangmo had chased Cap into the house and so maybe Cap was reluctant to go outside to pee and decided that the mattress was the best replacement. Recently I’ve been leaving the gate open overnight so it’s possible Tangmo has been here during the night and maybe chased our cats inside from time to time and made them afraid. I noticed Tigger being indoors more recently and I thought it was just due to the heat but perhaps it’s all connected with Mo. I wish he was a calm dog and could be friends with our cats, but we don’t have much choice as he’s not ours. I’ll be keeping the gate shut more now though.

What is happening around me right now?

I’m sitting in Tid Doi Tid Din having just finished some lunch. I needed a full food hit to keep me going today so ate green curry salmon with rice and cabbage in fish sauce. Not sure if it’s enough to buck my energy up but at least it’s a fresh range of vitamins and minerals.

I’m sitting at a corner table next to the window and near the door. Outside, cars and trucks speed past on the highway only about ten feet from where I’m sitting behind big plate glass and in the cold air conditioning. Outside looks hot and I can’t decide if I want to go to Daytripper to see if they have banoffee or not. I’m enjoying the aircon as I see students on motorbikes (3-up) at the U-turn burning their bare exposed legs in the sun or on the bike’s exhaust.

There are not many customers here but enough to keep the staff on the move. This restaurant is kind of attached to the hotel behind it from which it draws most of its custom. I haven’t been here for about three years though do very occasionally order delivery from here. It’s expensive for the students and across the highway I can see a plethora of white shirts and black pants and skirts in the local food shop with 30 baht plates.

The environment inside is appealing, a mix of modern with traditional wood finishes and floors. The wall opposite me is lined with rows and rows of bottles of wine and beer and by the door the clunky PC and keyboard that controls everything.

I took this picture because I’m treating myself to lunch today.

Squash – 18th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Some days feel so full of lack
And nothing goes right at all
Remember that you’ll be bouncing back
Just like a small black rubber ball

It is only when you meet someone of a different culture from yourself that you begin to realise what your own beliefs really are.

George Orwell, The Road To Wigan Pier

Today I’m feeling:
Good but a little frustrated.
Today I’m grateful for:
The couple of orders I received for tenzenmen products after a quick promo post a couple of days ago. I don’t sell much these days but I appreciate everyone who shows interest.
The best thing about today was:
Playing with Tangmo with the rope as I went off to the post office and market and him proudly running off and presenting the rope to the aunties back home. When I came back I rode up and collected it from auntie Sue and we both chuckled. Tangmo had gone off in search of other adventures by that time.
Daily thought
How are you going to remember to keep fighting when the storm is around you? Running away is the easy option and sometimes serves a purpose but how are you to calm yourself down in the heat of the moment and carry on?
What is your “grit” word?
A ‘grit’ word? Is this a thing now? A word to remind yourself to keep going? I could have done with that today. After leaving my class early because I was annoyed by the attitude of some students, I talked with Saipan later (she is one of the smarter, motivated ones) and told her I wasn’t happy with the classes behaviour today and she just looked at me and said ‘keep fighting ‘ like she was a wise old auntie. Keep fighting or ‘su-su’ in Thai is what everyone says to a complaint and in my mind, there’s an underlying implication of ‘shut up and get on with it.’ Maybe this is my grit word.

Someone took this picture because they need a friendly foreign face for the school promotional material and it was my turn. I seem to be looking off to the side but at least my eyes are open! The girl is JubJib, a smart one in my class who I can’t really teach as her skills far surpass many of the other students whose level I have to teach to.

Pie Time – 26th October 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Savour the crumbs of the pie
Scraps picked from the floor
Be sure to breed and multiply
The cogs must turn some more
Money is power is oil is gold
Not for some to touch
And so the story has been told
From parent to child as such
Oil is power is money is gold
Only for some to touch
And so the lie has been sold
There’s already too much
So savour those crumbs of pie
Get back to the factory floor
Sons step in as fathers die
And so remains the score

Leaving this will be easier than living it.

Charles Bukowski

Today I’m feeling:
am: happy and relaxed – pm: tired and subdued
Today I’m grateful for:
My hair bleach to make me feel younger, at least when I look in the mirror. I’m still mixing up old congealed powder that I bought years ago and too thrifty to throw out. It’s not perfect but it still does the job.
The best thing about today was:
Crossing a few little bits and pieces off the to-do list. I have a few more that I have to remember for tomorrow too including picking up a cake for my birthday that Amy has arranged for me. Thank you my lovely little Amy.
What jobs do you do in life that you don’t get paid for?
Thinking in reverse, I do one job of teaching that I do get paid for and I don’t get paid for anything else so it comes down to what might be considered a job. I have a hobby promoting musicians and their music that does have minimal income but I don’t consider it as getting paid and loses more money than it gains. I don’t have any philanthropic jobs. I do work at things but none of them are jobs.

I took this picture because Kim Chi is enjoying sitting on the toilet mat and doesn’t move out of the way when I want to go. This is what I look down at!