Tag: sunrise

This Could Be Anywhere – 10th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 4 Comments

Child, let me take you by the hand
Angel, let me walk you home*
The future, waiting to be planned
You don’t need to walk alone

The coming is with each step
Sun rising over dusty hills
The past taught not to forget
The truth each lesson instils

Praise each day’s hidden delight
Adhere to the wisdom of the word
Now let the sunset each night
Angel, your prayers have been heard

*paraphrasing Unrest’s ‘Angel, I Will Walk You Home’. It could be argued that the first line paraphrases Ralph McTell’s Streets of London too.
Title is a line from Gallucci’s ‘You-Wrecker’.
Submitted to No Theme Thursday

Today I’m feeling:

Tired and dizzy because of an evening coffee and then many trips to the bathroom during the night along with Cap wanting to be let in and out of the bedroom a couple of times. Hopefully I don’t sleep in the cinema this afternoon!

Today I’m grateful for:

Going out to see a movie for a change.  I’m grateful that even here in North Thailand I’m not far away from a movie theatre that shows movies in English.

The best thing about today was:

Nothing stands out today in particular.  Everything has been pretty good.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I was expecting to leave at around 2pm today but Amy was hungry and said we will leave at 12.  Well, ok then.

My yearly subscription renewal for Quizizz was automatically deducted today which took out a much-needed 800 baht from my account.  

Not much I can do about that as I need the subscription so that I can continue teaching with this tool next semester.  

I am grateful that they didn’t put the price up which is what normally happens.

Something I learned today?

Okinawa used to be called Ryukyu up until the 1870s and was a tributary state to China before Japan invaded on a murderous conquest.

What made me laugh out loud today?

I don’t tend to laugh out loud much these days unless I’m playing with my students at school – they certainly make me laugh a lot.  In day-to-day life though I am…subdued…. Is that the correct word?

I like to think that I am more emotionally stable these days, as I’ve mentioned before, and not so affected by the ups and downs of my mood.

In today’s thoughts about the best thing about today, the whole day has been pleasant and relaxing without any real highlights and definitely no lows.  This is preferable for me these days.

Perhaps I do need to laugh more (outside of school) and be a bit more playful, maybe.

Sarah took this picture on Thursday because I wanted a photo with Apple, Baipad and Jan to remember them and Iphone snuck in on the right too.

Roll Another Number – 27th February 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Everyone is so cynical
Opinionated, clinical
Fallen from the pinnacle
And waiting to expire

We’re all gonna die, what’s the point?
Who cares who the kings may anoint?
Sing a song, smoke another joint
Around the old campfire

Written for Ovi’s Challenge – Negativity. Titled borrowed from Nuisance.

Today I’m feeling:

Better but still tired out.  I took it easy with my first class but I was still exhausted by the end of it.  No exercise this morning either so that is now five days without.  I will try to do it tomorrow.  I usually feel better in the evenings than in the mornings though.  Let’s see.

Today I’m grateful for:

My former self of last week for planning ahead and quickly making up some cards for a quick vocabulary game with my grade 10s.  I wasn’t sure exactly how I was going to incorporate it in the class but I figured out a way to make it fun and engaging for everyone.

The best thing about today was:

Gradually getting my mojo back during the day and being able to not push myself or the students too much to stress ourselves out.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

With half of my grade 7 classes missing this week I’ve had to adapt myself to just playing Kahoots about the topic that we were on and making it as fun as possible whilst not putting any pressure on about punctuality and paying complete attention.

Something I learned today?

I forced myself to listen through a podcast of a couple of North American China Hawks discussing what the best way forward was for the USA to deal with China.

It reminded me that at the highest levels of Western governments, people cling to their ideology without growth or learning.  Some of the commentary had me contemplating just skipping it but I wanted to hear more opposition to the things I believe and to try to understand where some people are coming from.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

Anchan skipped my class today to prepare for a national (I think) competition for a speech in Thai.  She sent me a message to say why she wasn’t there and I wished her the best.

She also reminded me it was her birthday today and so I bought some sweet snacks for her and her friends.  They were so cheap that there were so many of them that when I got back to school and my next class, Nemo said that it was her birthday too and so I gave her one pack.

I later tracked Anchan down in another building and gave her the rest of the snacks.  She laughed because there were so many but appreciated them too.  Whilst I was there, many students wished her a happy birthday and I was surprised by all the people who knew her.

I can understand her popularity though.  She is a smart kid who, in my own class, I have seen make friends with almost everyone, investing time in them (and calling out ones that treat others badly).  I warned her once last year not to get dragged into the bad crowd and whether she heeded that or not, she worked out what was best and was still able to maintain friendships with them.  I could sense what she was capable of and she has even surprised me with her skills.  Except English!

I also offered to teach Baipad, along with Apple and Jan, during the holidays if they wished.  I know that this will be a struggle to get them to commit to but also maybe get them to see that this is free education that they are being offered.  It would also give me something else to do apart from playing XBOX for four weeks straight!

Who would I like to reconnect with? 

In some ways, I’d like to reconnect with my school friends just to get memories and stories from them from when we were at school.  It’s kind of interesting to discover what ever happened to everyone but at the same time, I don’t care that much either.  That seems weird to write down but I’ve lived almost forty years without knowing what happened to everyone it just doesn’t seem that relevant.

I always want to connect with people in the DIY punk scene in South East Asia though and would love to find another kindred spirit in the same way that Kimi was.  Parthiban in Singapore is the nearest I have but we’ve only been able to hang out one time previously.

I should also reconnect with folks in Australia, which I do do from time to time but I’m thinking I should chat with Swerve again as we spent a lot of time working on things in the late 00’s and had a lot of fun.  There are also plenty of bands that I’ve worked with that I don’t have much contact with these days too.  I should get back to that.

I took this picture at 7.14 am just as I was about to leave this morning. I was surprised to see clouds on the horizon and I shot this at the very first peak of the sun rising above them.

To The Bliss – 18th December 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 5 Comments

Challenge the unchallenged
Surrendering to the blissful
Ignorance, life unexamined
Anxiety becomes wishful
– A fate worse than death!

inspired by Existential Comics
submitted to Moonwashed Musings

Today I’m feeling:

Excellent.  Got up 5 minutes earlier than usual so that I can incorporate some stretching into my morning exercise routine.  Also gone back to two lots of exercise.  The habit is fairly well entrenched now so doing a little extra is not too much of an issue.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru David joining me briefly for a coffee at House. It cut into my writing time but actually, I appreciated a quick chat about AFL and racist English hooligans!

The best thing about today was:

Getting home around 2pm and getting lots of things done earlier than usual (trying to prioritise things).  It’s not even 6pm at the moment and just a couple of things left to do.  I was already contemplating going to bed and reading comics and I’ll do that soon I think. 

I need to adjust my sleep time a little too, with getting up five minutes earlier and extra morning exercise.  I don’t seem to have any problem falling asleep but I’ve not been getting good sleep recently due to waking up with pain in my right shoulder.

Something I learned today?

I read an interesting article on the West’s history of the Great Leap Forward in China and how no one who went there could find any evidence of a famine at all.  There were food shortages due to 3 years of crop failure and the US, intent on destroying the Communist Party of China, then sanctioned grain into the country.  However, the CPC continued to distribute grain to those most in need. 

The whole narrative is posited to be pure Western propaganda and the figures quoted for the number of people who died were just the usual number of people that died anyway.  When something is quoted as ‘6 million people died during the famine’ it implies that it would be on top of the normal death rate. 

The author provided lots of evidence and it also reinforces other articles I’ve read recently stating that the US war with China started when they realised the Nationalists would be defeated by the communists. 

Over time, I’ve become more convinced of the lies and deceit at play in the hands of the USA and it has become much harder to decide what is the truth.  As the old phrase states, ‘If you see the lips moving then you know they are lying.’

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

The usual encouragement to my students for trying their best.

What were some moments of joy I experienced this year?

This is hard for me to recall specifically but as moments of joy did not particularly stand out (which doesn’t mean I wasn’t happy or having a great time) I do recall moments of savouring. And these too are not specific but I do recall the feeling when it occurs.

Sometimes this might be several times a day and other times maybe just once a week. It could be on a bike ride, drinking a coffee, eating food or just sitting and reflecting. That feeling has come more often in recent years rather than moments of joy.

I took this picture because Cappuccino looked beautiful sitting in the soft light of the sunrise this morning.

Google It – 14th February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Just give me the answer
I don’t want to think
The end result the same
No waste of pen and ink

I don’t want to learn
Just want to jump the queue
Find the fast way forward
And the easiest way through

Smart enough to cheat
I’ll copy from the best
And when the time comes
I’ll just bluff the test

If I end up in the field
Painfully planting rice
I’ll remember those times
At the top were really nice

Today I’m feeling:

Smooth, content. I didn’t get enough sleep last night but it hasn’t put me in a bad mood, more like a dream state that I’m gliding through.

Today I’m grateful for:

The lady that always serves me at Oasis. She recognises me now and knows that I like to add sugar, vinegar and pickled chilli to my food.

The best thing about today was:

Relaxing a little into my classes today and enjoying the interactions with everyone. I was also heartened to receive small Valentine’s gifts from my old students as well as stickers from my current ones.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Amy called me and was annoyed and upset. I’d been to the hospital to see the psyche but I didn’t wait around to get the meds as there were too many people waiting. I knew I could come back later when it was quieter.

At some point, the hospital called Amy’s number because I hadn’t collected the meds. Amy’s phone diverts to her mum here in Thailand and then she calls Amy. I don’t know why no one calls me!

Amy checked on the camera and thought I wasn’t at home as I’d kept the doors all closed because of the air pollution but I was in the living room eating food and watching TV. When she called she wanted to know where I’d been and talked in an accusatory manner and this annoyed me as I was feeling very good until then.

Anyway, a little while later I’d worked my mood back into feeling positive again and called her at our regular time. She was tired and still a little grumpy so we didn’t talk long. Everything will be fine again.

Something I learned today?

I’ve read a little about a serious train derailment in Ohio that caused a huge explosion of dangerous toxic chemicals and that it hasn’t got much coverage there as the US focuses its media towards its coming war with China and having its population on board with that idea. Some reports have said that the effects of the situation are worse than a nuclear reactor meltdown!

I can feel it will soon be time to disconnect from news again soon. Everything is just seemingly fucked everywhere you look.

What makes me laugh?

Really there are not many things that make me laugh as such. I still enjoy comedy etc but that has a purpose to make you laugh. So the main thing that makes me laugh is, of course, my students. They make me laugh when they are happy and playful but also when they are angry and emotional.

I took this picture because the morning sun burns red through the haze on the horizon.

When All Else Fails – 1st February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

There’s a new gun in town
Throwing weight around
Scared of the open gate
When all else fails….escalate!

So diplomacy has failed
The ship of peace has sailed
Not gonna sit around and wait
When all else fails….escalate!

There’s a plan in place for winning
A great reset, a new beginning
The hawks will thrive on hate
When all else fails….escalate!

Today I’m feeling:

Happy and content

Today I’m grateful for:

The small teacher’s room that I’m able to use for my students to come and read, practice and discuss things. The room has, at times, been full of equipment, junk and other teachers. It is now quite clear of things so I’ve taken advantage of its availability.

The best thing about today was:

As mentioned yesterday I was frustrated with one class and had an idea for today which involved using the teacher’s room.

Instead of standing at the front of the class and instructing I started by asking the students to recall things we’d discussed this week on the topics of hobbies and clothes. I then split them into five groups and asked each group to come into the teacher’s room where we first discussed the activities they enjoyed or found boring and secondly to discuss what they thought about school uniforms which they got more animated about.

They used a lot of Thai and I used a couple of the top students to help translate but a few of them were also able to articulate their thoughts in English too. I

t went well for all five groups and I think everyone enjoyed this approach. I only wish it was possible to carry out classes like this all the time.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Despite my best efforts to keep food and drinks (except water) out of my classroom students still smuggle them in and left a lot of garbage and spilt drinks today. I handled it by cleaning up a little and thinking about how to make it better in future.

Something I learned today?

I watched a documentary about Paulo Coelho and wondered if I would like him in person or not.

I’ve only read one of his books so far and enjoyed it a lot but I was thinking if this person was explaining similar things in direct conversation then would I react the same way? Maybe I find it difficult to separate the words from the personality in conversation.

I find the spoken word can be overbearing whereas the written I can ruminate on without other influences involved.

I know some people in my life have given me their wisdom in conversation and I initially rejected it because of other things about them.

It’s all a reminder to find my own way and that even the worst of people can offer useful words sometimes. Take it all in and filter out what I don’t need.

What do you love most about yourself?

I’ve recently been looking at my diary from 1981 and see comments like ‘I am great’, ‘I will win’ etc and it reminded me of the positive attitude I had towards myself at that time. That was all well and good but I never learned how to deal with failure properly which was part of my downward spiral in the coming teenage years. I was even conscious of it at the time but didn’t know how to manage it.

Anyway, these days I am more confident again, with occasional lapses, and feel pretty good about myself most of the time. I love that I still have the determination to improve myself and not rest on my laurels.

I took this series of pictures because I was trying to capture the beautiful sunrise this morning as it was happening. It never looks as good in a photo but I wish I could’ve sat and watched it for longer but I had to get to work.

It’s Not Football Anymore – 27th January 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

No more beers at half-time
Or a quick drag on a fag
Now it’s all about advertising
The game has become a drag

No more fat moustaches
Or divots on the pitch
Now it’s all about the money
And seeing who can get rich?

Today I’m feeling:

Tired and dizzy. All the medicine has fought off the pain and cold but now I feel like a chemical cesspool. I just want to sleep until tomorrow and stop taking medicine so that I’ll be recovered by Monday.

Today I’m grateful for:

Being able to fall back on online games like Kahoot to fill my student’s class time so that I could come home and rest more.

The best thing about today was:

Reading lots of comics in bed as I dipped in and out of sleep this afternoon. I’m catching up on old 2000AD annuals and specials so that I’m in the same time frame as the weeklies where I’m approaching issue 1000. Not even halfway through! Maybe I will finish reading in another ten years.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

The one class I did have this morning was poorly attended and the students were in a lively mood, to say the least. I set a writing task about what they did this week and just went around helping them find the right words and grammar. It was interesting to have so few kids in the class for a change and it changed the dynamic a lot but still, a group of 12 and 13-year-olds together are going to be a handful.

Something I learned today?

I watched YouTube videos of Yan (Little Chinese Everywhere) in Turkey and Stamp Fairtex (Thai MMA fighter) in the US and there are so many interesting places in the world that I would like to see. But why does it feel like the world is fragmented and angry?

How can I rest or relax more often this year?

If I rest or relax anymore this year I’ll stop moving. I think I’d like to rest less and be more active.

I took this picture because it’s almost impossible to not take a picture when faced with this scene as I step out in the morning.

Feeling a little sorry for myself today. On the tail end of a cold and prescribed a stack of meds for my rib injury, I can’t tell if I’m well or not.
I pushed myself to school this morning where the kids that did turn up weren’t in much of a mood to study so I just assigned a little writing and helped them with that and they were happy enough to comply so that they could quickly get back to having their own fun.
By the end though I was deflated and decided to go home and assign some work for my last classes that they can submit online.
I’ll be glad to get back to fighting fit and regular school weeks again. I think there’s only six weeks left now and everyone will be in wind-down mode.

Creator – 20th January 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I am the creator
I made myself insane
No one can save me
Or identify my pain
If I’m the creator
I’ll create a world my own
Mastering my fate
I must do it alone
I’ll get what I deserve
Whichever way it goes
When my world is made
I’ll be the one that knows

undoubtedly inspired by Robert Greene’s Daily Laws

Today I’m feeling:

Happy, relaxed and loved

Today I’m grateful for:

The students who have confidence in me and trust me. Those who reach out for my help. Those that just come and talk to me for their amusement and daring.

The best thing about today was:

The happy feeling around the school during the Chinese New Year celebration. Even the students who came to my afternoon classes didn’t mind being asked to do a little work. It was a relaxed atmosphere which generated a good vibe. I wonder if it was because there were fewer students around? I wish it could be like that all the time.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I took Boss to the hospital today and as we were walking from where I parked the car I realised that I didn’t have a mask and sure enough I got stopped from coming in. I cursed myself for leaving mine in the car and expected to spend 100 baht to buy one there. I ran to the shop and when I found them they only came in tens! Oh no! But as I went to pay the cashier said ’20 baht’. A (minor) worry for nothing more than an Aussie buck.

Something I learned today?

Eyes are everywhere. At the hospital, we ran into a teacher and when I got back a student from another class asked me why I was at the hospital and showed me a picture that someone had taken of me there! Chiang Rai is so small that the gossip moves faster than the people!

What new experiences do I want to try this year?

Wow. I don’t know. I don’t want to go skydiving or bungy jumping. I guess my answer would revolve around travel and going to new places. Indonesia, Borneo, Philippines, Vietnam, and Cambodia – an all-in-one trip with a touring band would be ideal!

I took this picture because I was hoping to catch the sunrise as I drove up our road in the morning. It is perfectly aligned with the road with the chedi visible close by. However, the sun was already peaking up so I had to quickly grab this shot. The shot I wanted I should have taken on Wednesday or yesterday. I probably won’t get up in time on the weekend and by Monday the sun will probably rise in a slightly different position. This winter has been mild, most days not even needing a t-shirt in the evening. I think it may mean a long hot dry summer ahead.

Make The Call – 10th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

It’s just a call, dial the number
Maybe they won’t pick up
And all will be forgiven

Dial the number, make the call
The click of the pick-up
The heart skips
A new beginning
Nervous

Once words flow though
Out the stories pour
These things kept secret
Now shared experiences
Empathy and sympathy emerge
That won’t be so bad at all

No man can really say that he knows what joy is until he has experienced peace.

Henry Miller

Today I’m feeling:
Satisfied but still tired.
Today I’m grateful for:
My old student Kamboom, who messaged me and we were able to arrange to meet at Sammakhi next Tuesday. I can see from her messages that her English is excellent now. It must be nearly three years since I saw her last time.
The best thing about today was:
Watching Top Boy for a couple of hours and not getting itchy to watch something. I’ve been flicking around Youtube too much so it was nice to submerge into something a little more sustaining
Daily thought
Do you still think you can change the world?
I think we have to think like that. We change the world with the way we interact with others and any of our actions are passed along into the future. Even in a diminished capacity, every little thing we do moves us forward, for both better and worse. The seeds may be sown by a single word. I have to believe we can.
What do you explore on the evenings or weekends?
Evenings and many weekends are usually mental explorations. Otherwise, I like to go for long bike rides and explore tracks, often overgrown and unused. I don’t usually explore much on foot or explore different food and drink places. I’m comfortable with the good places I have found but know its also good to try new places and find other new favourites.

I took this picture because every year I can notice when the sun rises above the stupa on the horizon. It feels like my little Stonehenge although there’s nothing particular about today from where I’m looking out. I wonder where the sun rises above it on solstice days. It’s possible it carries some meaning in that way as quite a lot of cultural events are based around the moon at least.

Garden Haiku – 30th August 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 4 Comments

Passionfruit flowers
Precede overabundance
Jam jars are ready

Ripened or not so
Papayas can be eaten
Until sick of it

The rambutans red
Are all infested with ants
Inedible now

Avocado trees
Why do you never give fruit?
I want to smash you

My chillies just came
It was a surprise to all
Conditions perfect

26th Jun 2024 – Submitted to Weekly Prompts Wednesday Challenge

Pain and suffering are always inevitable for a large intelligence and a deep heart. The really great men must, I think, have great sadness on earth.

Fyodor Dostoevsky, Crime and Punishment

Today I’m grateful for:
The cookie I ate at House with my lunchtime coffee. It wasn’t particularly tasty or big but somehow it staved off any afternoon hunger so I ended up only needing yoghurt for dinner.
The best thing about today was:
Being able to talk to different students on a more personal level about more serious topics such as behaviour and respect. Even with the difficulties we have in communicating I feel as if I have their confidence in some ways.

I took this picture because I’d never seen the light on the lower mountains like this before. The sun was only just over the horizon to the east.

The Week That Was – 11th November 1979

Outside – 28th August 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

I don’t want to go outside
The rain spits knives at my blinking eyes
Don’t want to be outside
Angry ghosts stare at me in surprise
I don’t want to see outside
Evil awaits with sharpened knives
Don’t take me to the outside
Amongst the dead and zombied lives
I don’t want to go outside
The flashing neon against dull grey skies
Don’t want to be outside
To smell the carcass covered in flies
I don’t want to see outside
The monsters can’t get me in my bed
Don’t take me to the outside
Where the rats of paranoia invade my head

The day a child realises all adults are imperfect, he becomes and adolescent; the day he forgives them, he becomes an adult; and the day he forgives himself, he becomes wise.

Alden Nowlan, Selected Poems

Today I’m grateful for:
Pushing myself to walk to Utopia in the morning and recognising the extra energy that gave me throughout the day. I got a lot done.
The best thing about today was:
Reading more Gormenghast. I’m loving the language and imagery and being introduced to all these weird and quirky characters. I’m enjoying it more than the first book in the series so far. There were lots of other good things today too mostly because I was in a good mood because of my morning walk and the sun being out again.

I took this picture because this was the view of the sunrise on my first early morning walk. It was also nice to view the world around me from different perspectives.

Atrox, Disciples of the Elder, (A poet), Other Side Of The Fence – Cornwall Hotel, Dorchester, Dorset, UK – 15th March 1985